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I’m dangling bait in front of her face, and that doesn’t feel right. I just somehow want to resolve this ache that wonders if she’d ever choose me over him. Not that any choosing of any kind will be happening.
She stops, one ankle warbling in those heels. “I never loved Sebastian.” Her eyes are on fire.
“You hoped it was Sebastian working at the shake shop. I saw your face when it turned out to be me and not him.”
She sighs and pinches her nose. “Really? This is so juvenile. It’s how many years later? I didn’t even know Sebastian. I still don’t. You’re the one I hung out with every day of the summer for three years. You’re the one I’ve been friends with ever since then.”
“I didn’t imagine the pout.” Even now, it hits me. And she’s right—it is juvenile. But it’s like that part of my brain never grew out of it. And maybe, in some weird way, I want her to admit her feelings for him. Then that would prevent me from getting out of hand with these strange feelingsI’mhaving forher.
“The pout? What, like this?” She takes a step towards me and pulls her lips down, just a little. The bottom lip juts out and it’s a pink, sweet blossom. I want it. I want to kiss her whole mouth.
“Yes, like that,” I manage.
We stand there, a magnetism unlike anything I’ve ever felt going between us.
And that’s when I wise up and decide to extricate myself from this confusing situation.
I run a hand through my hair and shoot out a breath. “I’ve got a meeting to get to. Can you come back tomorrow? We should probably order the books soon.”
She takes a step back and runs her tongue over her lips. “Yeah.” She swallows hard. “I close up my big ole bus at around six. I can come after that.”
I give her an awkward “thanks” and then, in an act of self-defense, I head back to my office.
“Can you find your way out?” I turn to ask before I’m too far down the hall. She’s still standing there, looking at the blank space with wonder in her eyes, like she’s already dreaming up possibilities.
“I’ll—I’ll be fine, Oliver.” She says, not looking at me.
It’s said with resolve, and I wonder if she means she’ll be fine in more ways than just navigating her way out of the building.
I hope she does mean that. I hope we’re both “fine” enough to see this little arrangement through without damage to our friendship.
“Good,” I say.
Because she has to understand one thing. I care about her, I do. But I’m never settling down, especially with someone who used to be in love with my brother.
Chapter 7
Sophie
I spend my morning in Tollark, where I dress up in regency dress for my ladies’ book club. We set up lawn chairs in a circle outside of Scott in the Kroger parking lot so we can best corral the moms’ toddlers. With all that going on, it’s easy for me to not think about my disappointment over the resort library’s lack of space and good views.
It’s okay. I can do this.
In the afternoon in Fairhill, it’s harder to keep my mind off of it. I vacillate between pure excitement and dread. It didn’t help that we only had seven patrons, not counting Violet’s octogenarian mother who ended up taking a nap against the stacks.
Which was fine because then Violet could dish on her recent tour of several independent bookstores across the country. It was chronicled on her Bookstagram account to great success, but I wanted to get the real info: how things went with the guy her mom convinced to go with her at the last minute.
From her rush of whispered, detailed descriptions of their transcontinental adventures, it seems my twenty-something employee had afabuloustime.
Which I’m happy about. Violet deserves love as much as anyone. I’m not against love.
I’m against falling for the man who can only break my heart.
After such a scintillating day, I head home to shower and change.
My sister, Claire, was already home from her city administrator job. “New Girlbinge tonight?” she asks through the door while I’m in my room deciding what to wear. “Or do you want to go crazy and rewatch season one ofThe Mandalorian?”
“You’re on your own tonight, Claire,” I say through the shirt I’m trying to pull over my head, the fabric sticking to my mouth. “I’m going up to Tate International.” I squeeze my eyes shut, bracing myself for her reaction.
