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I didn’t want to go out on my heart’s terms.
I didn’t want to suffer another stroke and lose the ability of words and numbers.
After everything Cem had done to me, that had been the worst.
A living fucking nightmare being trapped in my body and housed in a mind that no longer worked the way it should.
It could happen again.
One day, I could see rainbows in my head while helping Bella with her math homework, and the next, I could be a fucking vegetable.
To think of Neri having to care for me?
To think of my family seeing me that way?
No.
Just...no.
I wouldn’t let that happen, and the only power I had over not allowing my body to forsake me was picking the time for me to forsake it.
Standing stiffly from the weathered bench swing we’d set up years ago to watch the water, I dug my cane into the sand and stepped toward her. Dawn-light caught her pretty seafoam-green dress, shimmering with reality and myth, making it seem as if she appeared from the ocean itself.
Our eyes met.
Our lips smiled.
No matter how many years passed, I would never get over the tingling sensation in my blood whenever she returned to me.
Home.
She’s home.
“Hello,” I said softly, not wanting to disturb the dawn. “You were a while.”
“Aslan, what on earth are you doing still waiting for me?” She marched toward me with balled hands. “I texted you to go on board Stardust. You should’ve been resting.”
“I can’t sleep if you’re not beside me.”
She winced and slotted into my arms. “And you think I can?”
“I know you will.”
“I’m not having another fight with you, Aslan. I said my piece before I left you for that interview. You know I can’t sleep without you either, and I never intend to.”
I sighed and kissed her before letting her go. “Not this again, canim. I thought we’d settled it before you left this morning. Well, yesterday morning now.”
“We did. We settled everything. Where you go, I go.”
“And I said that’s not happening.”
“And I said, bite me.”
A chuckle escaped me, smothering my frustration. “You don’t know what you’re asking me to agree to.”
Her eyes met mine, the blue catching flecks of new sunlight. No matter the age that stamped its relentless time into us. No matter the white hairs and wrinkles. I only ever saw her as the girl I fell madly in love with. My little water sprite, my sexy siren. She still had a power over me that made lust an insatiable force. Still made my heart kick and palms sweat. Still made me adore her.
“I do know what I’m asking,” she whispered. “I knew the moment I felt your first heart flutter that this was how it would end. It’s always been you, Aslan. Just you. Don’t ask me to give you up because I won’t.”
