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I always thought dying would be scary, but knowing I survived David, and I’m here with the man I love, my mind slips into a state of peacefulness. I stare into his ocean eyes and lift my hand to touch his warm cheek.
"I love you, and I’m yours, Cole Walker. All rights reserved. Forever and always."
His lips tremble as he bends and places a feathery kiss on my mouth.
"Don’t you give up on me! I need you. You’re my power woman in heels."
I try to smile, but the overwhelming draining sensation overtakes me. It's like something is pulling the energy from my body and I'm unable to stop it. I try to fight it with everything in me. "I... love..." But the words die on my mouth as a sudden white blur takes over. Cole's deep voice calling out to me is the last thing I hear before I'm pulled into a vacuum of nothingness.
"Alex. Stay with me. Alex!"
44
COLE
A burning sensationblasts through my chest when she goes limp in my arms.
"No! Alex."
I lay her flat on the ground, check her pulse, and watch her chest—Nothing.No, this can't happen again.
The ambulance and police car arrive with howling sirens, but I don't wait to come into action. I place my hands on her breastbone and start pumping. After my father died, I did a CPR course, and I make myself do a refresher class every year. But doing it on the woman you love is taking it to a whole other level. After a round of chest compressions, I tilt her head back, close her nose and give her mouth to mouth, checking if her chest rises as I do. "Come on, Alex. You said we would get out of this shithole together, so don't you fucking dare leave me."
"Sir, let us take over," a male voice says.
"I can't!" I say, in a frantic voice, my eyes never leaving Alisha.
"Sir, it's okay. We're the ambulance crew. You've done amazing, but let us take care of her from here."
It takes every ounce of willpower to let go of my girl. But the moment I do, the two skilled paramedics are on her. The woman immediately presses something on her wound while the man checks her heartbeat.
"She has a pulse. It’s weak, but it's there."
"Your quick handling made a tremendous difference, sir. Excellent work," the woman says.
"When she's ready for transport, we'll get her to Massachusetts General Hospital."
The trauma helicopter arrives, and two people climb out and rush over to us. Medical terms fly as they negotiate with each other about what to do, but my focus stays on my woman. She’s so pale. They've hooked her to a heart monitor, and the beeping sound causes a flashback to the night of my father's death. Images of him lying on the floor burst through my brain. The helplessness. The guilt. It hits me all over again. Suddenly, the well-known flatline tone echoes through the air, and I lose it.
"Alex!"
I try to stand, but when I observe how they do chest compressions on her lifeless body, it's as if my muscles lose their power.
A person squats beside me. "Sir, my name is Ian. I'm a paramedic too."
"She can't leave me. Please," I say, staring at my bloody hands. "You need to save her." Tears stream, and I gasp when they yell ‘clear’ and they shock her.
"Alex!" I heave. "Don't give up. I can't lose you."
"Easy, sir."
My heartbeat shifts higher and higher, and when I get up, it's as if someone flips a switch, turning everything black.
* * *
I openmy eyes at the sweet sound of a well-known piano part drifting through the air. God, I love that piece.
"Ah, you're awake."
