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Teague studied him for a second. “You two got off on the wrong foot, didn’t you? That’s why the pair of you seemed a little awkward at first.”
“And I told you, we got over it.”
“Fine, but let me run something past you. If things were awkward between you, why would he make it worse by telling you he was into all that? He didn’t tell any of us that night, did he? He wanted us to feel relaxed, comfortable. Maybe that’s why Toby did all the talking.”
“Okay, but things were better between us by the time he left. He could’ve said something then, but he didn’t, like it was a secret.”
“Well, it isn’t a secret now, is it?” Teague retorted. His frown deepened. “Besides, what difference does it make if Sol’s into BDSM? I’ll tell you. Absolutely none at all. He’s still Sol.”
That wasn’t helping.
“I’m just not sure what I’m going to say to him when I see him, that’s all.” Except that was a huge understatement.
Teague let out a noise of exasperation.
“Then isn’t it fortunate he won’t be sleeping in the bunkhouse with you guys? That way you won’t feel uncomfortable.” Teague cocked his head. “I don’t get it. You’re pretty relaxed around Toby. So I’ll ask again. What’s the difference?”
Butch couldn’t answer that, because for the life of him, he didn’t know.
Teague let out a sigh. “Quit thinking so much, all right? Sounds like there’s a heap of stuff going on in Bozeman this weekend. Why not go see what’s going on? You know, let your hair down a little.” He snorted. “I forgot. You don’t have that much to start with.”
“Bastard.”
Teague chuckled. “Yeah, but you love me.”
“Course I do.” Their relationship might have undergone a monumental shift, but that wouldn’t change what they’d shared through the years.
The boss, Teague, Zeeb, Matt, Paul, Walt… They were his family. Give it time, and Toby would be in there too.
Zeeb poked his head around the bunkhouse door. “Lights out in ten minutes. You’ve got an early morning run into Bozeman, haven’t you? You’re dropping Ian at the Baxter.”
“And don’t forget, Butch needs his beauty sleep,” Teague quipped.
“Fuck you,” Butch fired back with a grin. “Go play with yourself in your cabin.”
Teague’s grin eclipsed his. “You read my mind.” He walked off, and Butch was certain Teague was giving a little wiggle of his hips on purpose.
He went into the bunkhouse a damn sight calmer than he’d been a few minutes before.
Teague talks a lot of sense. Why am I making such a big deal of this?The comparison with Toby had helped put the situation into perspective.Toby’s into all this, and he’s okay.
He got ready for bed on autopilot, aware of the chatter and laughter around him. The guests had been a good bunch, easy to get along with, and he hoped the next lot would be as amenable. But by the time he lay beneath his comforter, his thoughts defaulted to Sol once more.
Toby talked about Doms and submissives. Which one is Sol?Toby hadn’t come right out and said he was a Dom, but that was the feeling Butch got after listening to the way he spoke to Walt and Teague, and after that talk he’d given them too. He could picture Toby being the one in control.
And that’s what it’s all about, right? Control.
At least, that was Butch’s take on it. He didn’t want to think too deeply about the boss and Toby—whatever they got up to was no one’s business but theirs—but he couldn’t help wondering how things worked between them.
All that stuff in the barn… Floggers, paddles, benches…He couldn’t picture the boss letting anyone spank him or paddle his ass. But then he recalled how Kevin Porter had been around the boss. Nothing was ever said, but he got the feeling Kevin had called the shots in the bedroom. Not that Butch could pinpoint any particular mannerism or words that gave it away—it was just a feeling.
An instinct.
Then it hit him.
For the first time, he realized just how much the boss had lost when Kevin died. Because Kevin had to have beenwaymore than a lover, a partner. Butch didn’t know a whole lot about BDSM—the sum of all his knowledge could be written on the back of a packet of cigarettes—but he knew enough to realize they must have shared something pretty intense.
And then he lost it all.
