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“If he approves of that then, yes, absolutely.”
I take a few seconds. “Okay, thank you so much for your time, Tony. I really appreciate it.”
“Of course, Juliette. Thanks for reaching out, and call back anytime.”
I hang up the phone and send a quick text to Caleb asking if we can meet.
Me:Hey, it’s Juliette. Any chance you’re around to grab a coffee?
He responds immediately.
Caleb:Absolutely. Name a time and place and I’ll be there.
I give Zara a call to confirm that she can come watch Chloe for an hour before sending an address to Caleb and asking him to meet me in 30 minutes.
“Hey, Miss Pierce! Long time, no see.” Zara smiles, hugging me after stepping over the threshold. Her hair is now a dark brown—almost black—that fades into electric blue tips.
“I know, life has been a shit show lately. I promise to sit down and explain it all to you soon.” I barely get the door shut behind her before Chloe is running down the stairs.
“Zara!” She runs straight into her, almost knocking over her waif-thin frame, making Zara laugh. “I have so much to show you,” Chloe says, grabbing her hand and starting back upstairs.
“Okay, I’ll be back within the hour.”
“Bye!” The girls wave before running upstairs, and I head outside.
When I get to the coffee shop, Caleb is already seated. He waves, standing up as I approach.
“Hey.” I smile awkwardly as he leans in for a hug.
“Hey, thanks for reaching out. I took the liberty of ordering for you. You still take your coffee the same?”
“I do, thank you.” I smile at the gesture even though I find it annoying considering he hasn’t been in our lives for the past several years. I push the thought aside, reminding myself that he’s trying before taking the cup in my hands and having a sip. “I spoke to Tony before I came here.”
“And? Did it go well?”
“Yeah, it did. He mentioned that you’d tried to get sober previously, but something changed this last time that made you really stick with it. Can I ask what that was?”
He looks away from me, down at his mug, then back up at me. “It was you.”
“I’m sorry?”
“I found and reread the letter you’d written to me the last time we saw each other. You had every right to hate me—to tell me to go to hell—but you didn’t. You wrote that you would always root for me—that you’d always want me to get better, because Chloe would always love me. It just clicked. I can’t say why, but it was like I realized I was staying stagnant while you and Chloe moved on and were living, thriving.” He shakes his head. “All this time, I had convinced myself I was only hurting myself, but the reality is, I was hurting everyone around me—all the people I loved the most. I knew that if I didn’t get clean, I would never be able to live with myself, because I would never see you or Chloe again.”
I fight back the tears. He’s saying the things I’d wanted him to say years ago. I’ve gone through all of the stages already: anger, denial, you name it. Now I just feel relief. “I don’t think I was expecting you to say that.” I dab at my eyes with my napkin. “I’m going to be very honest with you. I want you to succeed, Caleb. I want you to stay clean more than anything, because I want you and Chloe to have a relationship. I’m not saying it’s going to be perfect from day one. I think you’re going to have to work really hard to earn her trust and friendship—and hopefully respect and unconditional love—but I know that’s possible. I believe in you.”
He wipes at his eyes. “Now I’m the one crying.” He laughs. “I can’t tell you how much that means to me. I want to be that man. And I know it will take time. I’m willing to work for it. I’m willing to do whatever you feel is best.”
“I appreciate that. I think maybe we’ll start with just reintroducing you two. We can always have dinner some night if she feels comfortable.
“I would love that. Also,” he hangs his head, “I owe your boyfriend an apology. I know I was way out of line. I think I was feeling threatened over the fact that someone new now has what I stupidly threw away.”
“Well . . .” I’m not sure what to say, since I don’t think Alex is or ever was my boyfriend. “We can cross that bridge later. For now, I’ll talk to Chloe and see what she feels comfortable with. I did talk to her this morning about seeing you and having you in her life, and she is open to it.”
We talk for a little while longer, catching up on our lives. “I should get back. I told the babysitter I’d be back within the hour.”
“Hey, Jules,” he reaches out and grabs my hand as I stand up, “thank you.”
I take my time walking back to the house. The crisp autumn air is refreshing. I think about taking some time off from work—just having a few days of downtime so I can try to feel rested and refreshed after these last few months.
