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“I begged to be allowed out of the marriage,” I said. “I asked them to send me to a convent; I had all of the paperwork printed out to show them.” I shook my head. “It tookweeksfor my bruises to fade after that.” I held up a piece of my hair and showed him a scar that traced the edge of my hairline and my temple. “It was only my mother’s begging and promising that I would comply that kept me alive.”
There was a long pause, and when I looked at Omar, his whole body seemed clenched with tension. Violence against women wasn’t absolutelyunheardof, but I was the daughter of the man in charge. I should have enjoyed a certain level of security. “I’m surprised that you’re so…pious.”
A laugh bubbled out of my chest. “I’m not…but at fifteen, I thought it might be the only thing that would save me. I had a cousin who chose to become a nun, and my fatherstillspeaks about her like she’s a saint.” Annaliese had come to visit exactly once after taking the habit, and she was so horrified that she cut off all contact. Still…our family canonized her. She had a “noble” calling.
I was the ungratefulputawho wanted to shirk her duties.
Omar broke into my thoughts. “You didn’t consider what you’d be giving up by becoming a nun?”
Giving up? “My family? I was trying toescapethem at the time.”
Omar smirked at me, and his eyes dragged down my body. I shivered: I could almost feel that look like a touch. “That’s not what I meant,conejita.” He stepped closer to me. Heat radiated off him in waves.
Understanding flashed through me, and I took a step away from him. “I wouldn’t have missed it,” I insisted. “Why would I miss something likethat?”
Omar was grinning now, and I knew he was going to touch me moments before he actually did. He backed me up against the window so that my back was pressed against the sun-warmed glass. “You seemed to enjoy my hands on you before.”
I scoffed and tried not to struggle in his grip. It would probably just exciteLa Bestia, after all. “You left before I could enjoy it fully,” I spat back. “Should I hope that Felix has better luck at pleasuring me?”
Omar’s grin morphed into a snarl. “As if he could.” He reached up and ran his thumb over my bottom lip; it was a possessive gesture that made me gasp as heat shot through me. “Do you know why men his age go after virgins?” The question was rhetorical, and even if it wasn’t, I didn’t have an answer. “They want some inexperienced girl who won’t be able to tell if they’re shit-poor at what they’re doing.”
I should be quiet. I should get away from him as quickly as I possibly could…but I didn’t want to. He was dangling that dangerous, delicious pleasure that I’d only glimpsed before, and even though it could be another trick, a cruel prank to further break my spirit, I wanted it.
“Well, how am I supposed to know the difference?” It was a challenge, and I saw the recognition spark in his eyes.
Omar leaned into my space again; I could feel his breath against my skin, and I didn’t squirm away or try to push him. Instead, I tipped my head up so that I could meetLa Bestia’seyes. “Do you want me to show you,conejita?”
Say no, I commanded myself. It was a last-ditch effort from my brain to get my body to run, to be the girl that my father had trained me to be…but I wanted him. And if I was going to go into a marriage with Felix ordie, I wanted to have something for myself beforehand. I took a breath. “Yes.”
Omar eased forward slowly, almost cautiously, and then his lips were on mine again. The kiss was soft at first, but then his tongue brushed against my bottom lip before pressing into my mouth. I gasped at the intrusion, but let myself be kissed. And kissed. And kissed until my head was spinning.
“Put your arms around me, Lyse.” His voice was commanding but not threatening.
I shivered and wound my arms around his neck, pressing my body against his. He was sobig. It would be so easy for him to hurt me — hehadhurt me — but his hands were gentle now, as if I were some precious thing. The difference was maddening.
Omar picked me up, wrapping his hands around the backs of my thighs, and I gasped. “Your shoulder.”
“It’s fine,” he insisted, and while I tightened my grip on him, there was no fear of him dropping me, even with an injured shoulder.
He walked across the attic to the counter that extended along the only wall that didn’t have windows. There was a sink that was clearly there for cleaning brushes and palettes, and my heart sang at the idea of painting again…but that could come later.
Omar set me down on the counter and laughed. “Even when you’re boosted up, you’re small.”
I flushed. “Shut up.”
He shook his head. “I don’t think I will.”
Before I could argue with him, he leaned down and kissed me again, though he didn’t linger at my lips for long, instead choosing to pepper kisses down my throat. I trembled at the feel of his mouth on my skin. My fingers tracked into his hair and wove through the silky strands, holding him against me as he searched out all of the places that seemed to send sparks through my veins.
Omar’s fingers curled around the edges of the too-big tee shirt that I wore, asking without asking if he could take it off. I pulled away and reached down so that I could pull the shirt off over my head. I could feel his eyes on the lace of my bra.
“Should I—?”
His eyes were dark, and he nodded. “Take it off.”
I reached behind me and unhooked the clasp of my bra, letting it go slack across my chest. Omar took it the rest of the way off. With my breasts bared, Omar bent and took one of my nipples into his mouth. I gasped as little zips of pleasure ran through me. I had no idea that I was sensitive there.
I felt the edge of his teeth and let out a little cry. “Omar!”
