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“Just for the holidays. Lance and I met earlier in the summer. We have so much in common,” Cynthia replies.
Lance snorts a dry chuckle. “Yeah, we both used to love mixing pills and booze at the same time.”
“We met at rehab,” she says. “He’s been a ray of sunshine ever since. We’re both healed and so happy together. I really just wanted you guys to meet him. I hope you’re also happy and thriving, as well. You are, right?” Damn, she actually looks worried as she asks that of Matthew.
He offers another slight nod. “We’re alright, thanks for asking. I really wish you’d reached out first.”
“Oh, you were in the middle of something,” Cynthia responds as she looks my way. Shit, now I feel naked and exposed in my flimsy silk robe and the even flimsier lingerie underneath. The cold grin she gives me sends shivers down my spine. “I didn’t mean to interrupt. My apologies.”
“It’s fine,” Matthew replies.
“Let’s have dinner one of these nights before the first blizzard hits,” she says. “Lance and I will bring the wine. I know you guys have your favorites, but we found this fantastic cabernet while on a trip through Napa Valley in August… I brought a bottle back just for you.”
Matthew looks at me once more, and all I can do is give him a weak smile. It feels as if my whole world is about to fall apart, crumbling brick by brick until the prospect of going back to Providence becomes a clearer outline on a foggy horizon. I breathe in Jason’s musky scent and struggle to hold on to his presence, but leaning against him feels like the most inappropriate thing I can do in this moment, considering the impact that Cynthia’s return has on these guys.
I literally wish my head were as empty as Lance’s obviously is. Ignorance really is bliss.
“We’ll let you know,” Matthew finally says.
“I’d love to know more about Cynthia from her friends,” Lance replies with a beaming grin. “There’s so much she hasn’t told me yet. I’m sure you guys have all the nitty gritty details on this goddess of a woman.”
“Oh, honey, you flatter me,” she laughs, playfully slapping his shoulder as he snakes an arm around her waist and pulls her closer. I notice she only has eyes for Matthew, and the joy she exhibits in his presence makes me feel uncomfortable. A fifth wheel to an ensemble that clearly had a greater impact than what I read in her diary. “Seriously, guys, let’s do dinner. How about Friday? I’d love to just catch up and see how you’ve been.”
“Fine, let’s do Friday,” Matthew caves in with a strained smile.
“Fantastic. Don’t cook, though. We can just order something from Vespucci’s, okay?”
“Vespucci’s?” Lance asks, somewhat confused.
“It’s a new Italian place that opened up downtown. They have the best seafood on this side of the state,” Cynthia replies. My gosh, she sounds so excited and vivacious. No wonder they were nuts about her, so deeply enamored by her that they shared her the way they did. She never had to ask them like I just did.
“It’s set, then. Friday night.”
“Friday night,” Matthew sighs.
“I’ll see you guys then,” she quips, then glances my way one last time. “Maybe we’ll run into each other again if you’re out for a walk. That part of the woods is lovely during the day, isn’t it? Sorry, I never asked your name.”
“Selina,” I manage.
“Selina. What a pretty name,” she replies.
Before I can mutter thank you she grabs Lance and leaves. Almost immediately, Matthew slams the door shut and locks it three times, then turns around to look at me. He appears absolutely devastated, and I can tell it’s going to have deep and severe complications for our still-young and fragile dynamic. I can smell the end coming from a mile away.
“Selina, I think we need to talk,” he says.
I remind myself that I am not supposed to know who Cynthia is, despite the sharp ache currently tearing through my heart. I force myself to smile softly, my eyes stinging with tears as I try to keep my composure. “What’s up?” I ask, my voice breaking.
“Cynthia isn’t just a friend in the traditional sense, she never was,” he says. “We were involved with her.”
“Oh. Okay,” I whisper.
Jason lets a heavy sigh roll out of his chest. “It’s kind of complicated.”
“Not really,” I reply bluntly. “There was clearly something going on between the four of you. Something big enough to rattle you to the core upon seeing her tonight.”
“Selina, it’s not like that,” Matthew tries to say, but I’ve already turned and decided on a perfect exit for my wounded heart and bruised ego without revealing the fact that I’ve known about her all along. I wave the three of them away and head for the stairs. “Selina, wait.”
“No, it’s cool,” I reply, my voice trembling as I run upstairs. “I’ll see you guys tomorrow, I’m not hungry tonight.”
