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So, I promptly hired a limo and rallied my twin cousins into it.
We were now on our way to pick up Mom and her sisters and take them out on the town, because no way was Jacob getting a bachelor party and Mom wasn’t getting a bachelorette. What year was this anyway?
Now that Dani and Danica and I were alone for the first time since this morning and they also had champagne in hand, they’d promptly demanded to know what the deal was with me and Shane in the pool house today. And since I didn’t want their dirty minds to go all jumping to the wrong conclusions—especially Dani’s; hers was extra dirty—I’d told them about the disgusting “offer” Shane had made me.
“You should definitely fuck him,” Dani repeated, confirming that I had actually heard her right.
I gaped in shock and looked to Danica for help.
“Don’t listen to her,” Danica said easily. “You should definitely not fuck him. You shouldn’t ‘fuck’ anyone. Not until you’re in a loving, committed—”
“Oh, stop,” Dani interjected. “She’s not seventeen anymore, Danica. Our little baby cousin has grown up. She should fuck whoever she wants to. And Shane Madrigal is dirty and hot and single, and he made the first move. What more do you need? Just go for it.”
“I’m… but…” I stuttered.
“He’s got a hot body,” Dani informed us, as if we hadn’t noticed that this morning, when we saw him in his underwear. “I saw him in a wet swimsuit at Margot and Jacob’s one time and he’s definitely packing some heat.”
“That’s not really helping,” Danica said.
“Are you referring to his dick?!” I demanded.
“Yes, Jolie,” Dani said calmly. “I’m referring to his dick.”
“Our parents are getting married! We’re like… step siblings!”
“Don’t make it sound so pervy. You’re both adults. It’s not wrong.”
“It’s not right, either.”
“Would you or would you not fuck him if he rolled up to you when you were horny and alone one night, and no one saw you together, and he said, ‘Jolie, let’s fuck’?”
I promptly started to sweat. “Pour me a champagne, please.”
Dani started happily pouring me a glass.
After almost hurling and then falling on my ass last night in front of Shane and his “date” and my boob popping out, and then my bed spinning for half the night while I heard their laughter and those ass slapping sounds in my head, I never would’ve thought I’d want to drink again. But go figure. Here I was.
Lady Gaga, “Summerboy,” was playing, because that was literally one of a few musical artists Danica and Dani could actually agree on. And the song was just supporting Dani’s argument for her, as she thrust the champagne at me and I took a tentative sip. Wasn’t that what you were supposed to do when you went away for the summer: just enjoy a summer fling? Screw some hot guy and just leave it at that?
Not when he’s your stepbrother.
And a bonafide swamp troll.
“See,” said Dani, when I still didn’t answer her question. “Told you so. You’re only fighting it because you don’t want to give it up to him.”
“Uh, yeah. That’s exactly why a woman says no.”
“I’m not talking about your pussy. I’m talking about your power. You don’t want to say yes to Shane because you loathe him for embarrassing you—”
“That’s not—”
“You asked for my advice.”Did I?“So hear me out. Shane hurt your feelings. You can admit it or not but all three of us sitting here know it.” She gave Danica an accusing look.
Danica just shook her head.
“You think he’s nasty and mean,” Dani pressed on when Danica didn’t jump in to support her argument, “because he kissed you just to try to embarrass you when you found out who he was. He played you. You were kinda feeling him—hence the kiss—so it wounded you a little. And you don’t want to say yes now and let him win.”
“So then she shouldn’t say yes,” Danica said firmly.
