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Genesis had been in my life for thirteen years. We had real history together. What I had with her was deeper than the love shit that Sax thought he had felt.
Eventually, it wouldn’t hurt so bad, right? I mean, I had to get used to the fact that my Baby Doll was engaged.
My hand gripped the bottle tighter as I thought about the diamond ring on her finger. Fucking Bowie taking her away from me again. Asking to marry her. Making her his when she was mine. She’d always been mine. Except now, it didn’t feel like it. She had another man’s claim shining on her pretty, slim finger. She had let him put it there. She had said YES to him. Didn’t she understand that saying yes to him was saying goodbye to me?
I sat up and took another long swig from the bottle. Four other empty bottles sat on the dresser across from me. Levi had said this was the last one he was getting for me when he brought it this morning. He’d said I needed to snap out of it and deal with shit. Well, he didn’t know what this felt like. He could kiss my ass. I’d call someone else to get me more.
How could she do this to me? To us? This would mess everything up. Change us. Fuck, I hated Bowie. If it was some dickhead I didn’t know, making him disappear would be tempting. But, no, she’d had to go and get back with our childhood best friend. Then get all engaged and shit. Why was he hell-bent on ruining my life? He knew I needed her. He’d left her! Broken up with her! I was the one who had stayed by her side. Not him!
Genesis’s text message sound went off on my phone, and I grabbed it, desperate for any connection to her. I missed her. She was with him in South Carolina right now. Her mom had forced her to go, saying she needed a break.
Coming home Saturday. I miss you! If you can carve out time for me, I want to see you.
I laughed. It was hard and loud. If I can carve time out for her. Shit. It was more like if I could get my ass sober enough. I knew I would though. Letting her down was something I couldn’t allow myself to ever do again. There was always the chance that they would break up. She might realize she didn’t want to be married to him.
I’ll be at the house, waiting on you.
I pressed Send. She needed to see that I was clearly the more dedicated man. Bowie wasn’t there for her all the time. What would happen when she married him and needed me? I’d fucking go to her, was what would happen.
Okay! I’ll order out, or we can go out. Your call.
I wanted her to myself. The idea of sharing her with even strangers annoyed me. I needed her cuddled up against me, watching a movie while I smelled her hair. If I could just go back in time and not go to Devil’s, get hammered, and miss my birthday night with her. If I had been with her and not messed it all up, she wouldn’t have left me. Wouldn’t have been at that damn event where she’d seen Bowie. This would not be happening to me.
I stood up and headed for my bathroom. I stunk. I needed a shower and a gallon of water. I wasn’t sure what today was or how much time I had before Saturday. What I did know was, I didn’t want to let her down. I was going to remind her how much she needed me in her life. That stupid ring didn’t mean shit. Baby Doll was mine, dammit.
After I showered and changed into clean clothes, I headed down to the kitchen. Huck was leaning against the counter, looking down at his phone when I walked in.
He lifted his eyes to me. “You decided to face the world again.”
“What day is it?” I grunted, opening the fridge.
“Thursday,” he replied.
I took a bottle of water from the fridge and opened it and began chugging it down.
“You going to sober up and fly to Arcadia for the Breeders’ Cup?” he asked.
I scowled. “That’s this weekend?”
He nodded.
“I can’t. You?”
He shook his head. “No. Gage, Sax, and Trev are going with Blaise and Garrett. I’m holding down things here with Levi. We were letting you have another day or two before we forced you out of your funk.”
I opened the fridge back up and got another bottle of water out. “Genesis is coming home Saturday.”
He cleared his throat. “As in she’s coming back to your mom’s old house?”
I glared at him. “That’s fucking home.”
“Maybe for you. Doubt it is for her.”
