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They taught us to be fearful of His wrath, but that’s an unrealistic expectation. We’re human beings with hearts.
“You might be on to something, Shaynie. But he makes me so dang—”
“Excited? Alive? Scared?” I finish for her.
“Yes,” she hisses, tossing her brush into the sink. “Those and more.”
“And what do you make him feel, Mera? Has he said anything to you, anything at all that makes you believe he feels things for you too?”
“I don’t know,” she confesses.
A throat clearing in the doorway catches us off guard, making me drop the items I had clutched in my palm. “If I may? I’d like to offer some advice from a man who knows Luca well,” Marco asks.
I nod my head as Mera says, “Yes, please.”
“Luca’s not your ordinary man. Has he told you anything about his past?” Marco probes.
“Yeah. I know that Julius was nearly forced into an arranged marriage before he met his late wife, and that in order to keep the peace between the two families, Luca married the wench that the head of the Alvarez family had contracted for Julius, before he’d met Ma, wedding in his stead so that his brother could have a life with the woman he loved,” Mera answers.
“Listen. Luca will be pissed at me for telling you this, but I don’t’ want you getting lost in your head and not giving him a chance, so I’m going to break some confidences and hope that you ladies don’t tattle on me. Yes, what you stated, that’s true, all of it. It wasn’t a happy marriage. She was a vile woman who was controlling and upset that she didn’t get the brother that she wanted. Julius, as the first-born son, was in line to take over the family. She hated Luca because he was second in line. She didn’t give him any heirs, claiming it was medical, but I think it was out of maliciousness. She was a hateful woman and made Luca pay daily for his second placement in the hierarchy. I’ve always given Luca props for not laying a hand on her in retaliation for her abuse. He was in a domestically violent relationship. He ate every spoonful of bullshit that woman fed him. Her family wasn’t any better. In fact, he was expected to be at their house for Sunday dinners, but he wasn’t allowed to sit at the table with them. He was too low on the totem pole to be accepted by them.”
“That’s horrible,” I gasp. “Who does that?”
“People who needed to be knocked down a peg or two,” Mera seethes, crossing her arms across her chest to keep her feelings locked down inside her. She only does that when she’s upset and distressed. It’s her way of holding herself back from lashing out. She’s a good woman, but she has the temper of an Irish man. “If she wasn’t dead, I’d give her a tongue lashing.”
“Karma came for her in the end. She died a slow and painful death,” Marco confirms.
“Good,” Mera sasses. “But what’s your suggestion on his feelings toward me? How do I fit into this?”
“Since you’ve been around, his mask has slipped. He no longer laughs mirthlessly. His smiles aren’t forced like they’ve been for twenty-plus years. Yeah, he still jokes like he always has, but it’s been his coping mechanism since he was a kid. Get past those defenses, Mera. Only then will you see the man he really is, and only then will he express himself freely.”
“How do I do that?” Mera asks Marco.
“Just keep being yourself,” Marco advises.
“How can I do that when I don’t know who I am?” Mera whispers, looking dejected.
“You know who you are, Mera. You're fun, you laugh at his stupid jokes, you banter with him. You’re strong, independent, and fiercely loyal. That may only be the tip of the iceberg, but it’s not far from shattering. Let yourself look past all the fears the nuns drilled into you and enjoy yourself. You may not know who you are, Mera, but us, your friends and family, we do.” Marco’s friendly words have my eyes clouding with mist. Dammit, what is it with strong men sharing their feelings with me that has me ready to cry at the drop of a pin?
“I’m your friend? You consider me family?” she asks in awe.
“Absolutely,” he replies. “Now, it’s time for you to consider us as those things too. Don’t you think so?”
“Yeah. I think I do, Marco. Thank you.”
“Anytime, Mera. Are you ladies wrapped up for the day?” e questions.
“Yes,” I reply. “We were just cleaning up.”
“Good. Let me help you with that and then I’ll take you to the media room. We got a few videos in that I think you ladies will enjoy.”
* * *
Tears stroll down my cheeks as the credits roll. “That was so sad,” I cry. “Senseless death.”
“Those poor boys.” Mera sniffles. “Finding that boy dead like that. Parents who don’t realize their kids left, walking railroad tracks, and those leeches! Can you imagine?”
“No,” I say, shivering. “I’d pass out if I came out of the lake with those slugs attached to my skin. Dang bloodsuckers. Note to self, we don’t wash or swim in foreign bodies of water.”
