AllFreeNovel
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Even though I don’t know much about him at all, I feel privy to his innermost thoughts and ambitions. Some of the topics we talk about are like dreams whispered beneath the stars on a rooftop somewhere. Most of the time we don’t acknowledge our personal lives; in these moments, we exist only for each other, and I’m okay with that.
And when he isn’t there during the day, I scroll back through our texts, and I wonder what we’ll talk about later. It gives me something to look forward to.
When I’m about to reply, another message pops up.
Kai:too late:/ it just took a swing at me, I fear I may never recover from this fatal wound
Me:is the squirrel okay?
Kai:I just told you it attacked me, and you ask if the squirrel is okay?! Your betrayal may kill me before the blood loss
Me:lmaooo. Seriously though, did it actually attack you? They can carry some nasty diseases and germs in their claws
Kai:nah. It saw me and started knocking my pans and shit off the sink before it went out the window. Was just seeing if you’d care if I was potentially murdered by a squirrel, but don’t worry, Tess, I know where your loyalties lie now;)
Me:With the squirrels.
Kai:I’ve never been so close to one before. They’re actually quite ugly
Kai:it stared straight into my soul
Me:You have a soul??
Kai:looks more like a burned crisp actually
Me:why is that so funny???! I’m laughing so hard right now
Kai:What does your soul look like, Cucumber?
Me:probably a brownie
Kai:Why?
Me:I mean, like, if I could choose to have my soul look like something, it would definitely be a brownie
Three dots appear, and then disappear. It’s a couple minutes before he replies. It makes me think he’s hesitating about what he actually wants to say.
Kai:good choice
Me:why is that?
Kai:it’s impossible to get tired of brownies. Even if I eat an entire box, I still want more
Now, when I say my heart stutters, I mean it. Something about his words make me feel warm and I smile, but I also feel as if we’ve entered uncharted territory, so I attempt to shift topic.
Me:You should probably stop getting high then
Kai:I don’t need this kind of negativity, Tess
We talk for some time. I begrudge every single customer who has the audacity to interrupt our conversation, which probably isn’t ideal for morale, but I refuse to let anyone come between me and Kai. Our messages are mindless shit we’ve thought about during the day; mirages of rhetorical questions, the ones with no real answers, but we throw around conclusions anyway, until it feeds into a different subject.
Oftentimes I wonder what he looks like. Is he cute? Is he nerdy? I picture him with dark curls in a jumper that is so worn and loved the sleeves are frayed. I imagine he has a crooked smile with perfect teeth and dimples. But he could just as well be a middle-aged bald man called Brian with a severe beer belly and asthma condition.
That thought makes me nauseous, and I have to ignore his messages for a bit until I convince myself he’s not a middle-aged bald man called Brian with a severe beer belly and asthma condition.
I’m walking home when a woman stumbles out of a pub. I hastily step aside but her male companion pulls her out of the way and draws her in for a kiss. I keep moving until she laughs.
I know that laugh.
