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"How so?"
I blow out a breath. Roman's been transparent with me. S'pose it's only right I return the favor. "I've always played it safe. I'm Mr. Go With The Flow. Happy to go along with whatever."
"That doesn't sound too bad."
"Most of the time, it's not. But when I turned thirty a few years ago, I reflected on my life and it hit me how boring and predictable everything was."
Roman lifts a brow, waiting for me to continue.
"I've always taken the safe, logical option. I got good grades in school which got me into the vet training program I wanted. When I finished that, I landed a job in a local clinic. I worked my way up in four clinics in Brisbane, my hometown, progressing from junior to senior vet by thirty. The next step was to put in another decade or so and then open my own practice. It's just…"
Roman lets the silence stretch for a few solid seconds before gently pressing. "Just what?"
"I think… I think I want something more."
"More?"
"Yeah. I thought I'd gotten that with Bailey and moving to the States. As pathetic as it sounds, that's the most exciting thing I've ever done. But now that part of my life is ending. And even though I'm dreading the next few months and what Bailey has in store for me, there's this little voice in the back of my head that won't shut up. It keeps egging me on. Telling me that thereismore out there. That once I get through this shitty time, I'll find it. Whatever the fuckitis." I wave a hand in front of my face. "I'm rambling. Sorry."
"Don't apologize."
Roman's voice comes out so gruff and low it makes my balls tingle.
My eyes cut to his as he clears his throat. "Like you said, life is unexpected. Who knows what lies around the corner for you? Look at it this way, because you're such an easygoing guy, you're more likely to adapt to wherever those next steps take you."
"Yeah. I guess you're right." Never really looked at it that way before.
I glance at the table. We've pretty much demolished all the food. At least I did something to help repay a little of the kindness he's showing me. "Here, you have the last one." I push the platter toward him. "A small token of apology for unloading all this stuff on you."
"You can unload on me anytime." He closes his eyes and winces, and this time, his cheeks turn a much darker shade of pink. "Sorry. That came out wrong."
"Only if you have the humor level of a twelve-year-old." I pause for a moment. "Which I definitely do."
He lets out a breathy chuckle and devours the taco in three massive bites. Ido notpay attention to the way his jaw grinds and his neck pulses as he swallows.
"That was delicious," he says, stretching his arms overhead, his shirt lifting enough to reveal a patch of golden, slightly furry skin covering his abs. Then my gaze drifts over to the tribal tattoos covering both of his arms, andfuck. Why does that drive me crazy?
I have a grand total of zero tattoos. Bailey doesn't have any. In fact, I don't think any of the handful of guys I've slept with have had anything more than something on their biceps.
But with Roman, I want to trace my fingers over every line, every patch, every single part of every inch of ink he has.
Oh, did I say fingers? I meant tongue.
Once he's done inadvertently tempting me, he reaches for his phone. His brows knit closer. "I, uh, need to go get some…fresh air. Thanks for dinner. Leave everything. I'll clean up when I come back."
"Oh. Okay. You sure? I've made a huge mess."
"Positive," he says before dashing out.
I take everything from the table and stack the plates and dishes by the sink to make his gargantuan task a little easier. I can't see anything through the windows except for pitch black, so I leave the light on and make my way to my bedroom.
Roman's definitely hiding something. I've only lived with him for a week and I already know his tells. Whenever he lies, he frowns and uses the worduh. Never says it any other time.
My money's on him being a secret smoker, and he doesn't want anyone to know.
That's got to be it. Why else did he just bolt after a meal? Don't smokers say that the best ciggies are the ones after food and sex?
Also makes sense that he's trying to hide it since smoking isn't exactly socially acceptable these days. Next time he ducks out, I'll try and catch a whiff of him when he gets back.
