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I could tell him to fuck off or not say a single fucking word in response, but I’m not embarrassed about Parker and how I pursued her. I wanted to make sure she was a viable option. It’s not as if I’ve ever really dated or spent time with the same woman more than once. I needed to know what I was getting into, plus I enjoyed it.
Although not as much as I enjoy being inside of her.
“Yeah. Parker. It’s good.”
It’s all I say because, at that moment, Shiloh stumbles out of the club in a tiny dress and come-fuck-me heels. It’s time to get to work. I can’t believe this shit even happened. Holy fucking hell. How did my uncle think any of this was remotely even close to okay?
“You ready?” I ask Hendrick as she stumbles toward her car.
She’s alone, drunk, and possibly high. We follow behind her, and after a few moments of silence, Hendrick lets out a sigh.
“Ready as I’ll ever be.”
It’s not that killing someone is foreign or even that killing a woman is some taboo concept. It’s this whole situation. It’s really fucking bad. Between the building for sale, Coleman and this woman being our cousin whom he was fucking, my uncle being dead, and Shiloh’s mother.
All of it is a clusterfuck that I was not expecting this evening.
ChapterTwenty-Two
PARKER
After talkingto Doctor Hamilton and finishing cleaning my whole condo, I take a bath to ease my still-aching center and read while I soak in the tub. I’m having a hard time concentrating as I think about Wells and Doctor Hamilton, plus all the things she gave me to consider.
I’m not sure I did the right thing by allowing Wells into my condo, my bed, and my life. He stalked me. Hehuntedme. She made it very clear that she was worried I’d allowed myself to be in such a dangerous position.
Her words are making me think…hard. I’m insane. I must be. Nobody who’s normal does this and then tries to justify it by saying that nobody is normal. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. This is more than just my parents dying and my aunt and uncle being assholes.
When I took a good look at myself in the mirror, I couldn’t stop staring at the bruising on my neck. Have I just entered some kind of abusive thing? I’m not sure it’s a relationship, but I didn’t tell Doctor Hamilton about that part. I think she might have called the police or something if I had.
Now I’m lying in my tub, trying to think of what to say and do with this man. I’m scared. But I want to see him again. I love the way he feels. The way he looks at me. But Doctor Hamilton is right… I don’t know anything about him.
I need to get to know him better before I have sex with him again. I need to know who he is, more than just his name and his career. I need to know what kind of man he is if this is going to go any further.
And that’s where I want it to go, but I don’t know if it’s what he wants, too. There are a lot of unknowns with him, and this is my first attempt at any relationship. I’m trusting him to take the lead, but should I be?
When my bathwater runs cold, I go ahead and forget my book, climb out, dry off, and lather lotion all over myself before I head to bed. When I choose a pajama set, I keep Wells and his likes in mind.
Even though I know I shouldn’t.
Choosing a dark-plum silk babydoll gown, I slip it on before I finger the panties that go along with it and decide to leave them in the drawer. I should not do this, and I almost laugh because I bought all these pajamas just to feel pretty for myself, and here I am, choosing them for a man.
It’s like a dream come true, but I’m afraid that my dream might actually turn out to be a nightmare.
I just don’t know how to wake myself up from it all.
Slipping between the sheets, I prop two pillows behind my back and grab the remote control from my bedside table. I can’t concentrate on the book I was reading in the tub, so I turn on mindless television and hope it can drown out all the thoughts that swirl inside my head.
It doesn’t work. Inhaling a deep breath, I let it out slowly and wonder where Wells is. He claimed he would be here, but I knew he wouldn’t. Deep down, I knew that this was just a one-time thing, and once he left my condo, he wouldn’t come back.
Tears prick the backs of my eyes, and I try to hold them back, but they fall. I’m an idiot. I’m a little girl and a fool. I shouldn’t have even called Doctor Hamilton. Now she’s going to think I’m as stupid as I already know I am.
Eventually, my eyelids become heavy, and then I get lost in dreamland. I’m not sure where I go, but I’m glad to be there because it means I’m not awake and thinking only of Wells. At least in sleep, I can get away from him for a brief moment. He’s begun to consume my entire world, and it’s only been a couple of days.
* * *
The sun shineson my face, and I push myself up to a seated position. The pillows are still partially propped behind me, and the television is still on, but I have no idea what’s playing. I can’t remember the last time I fell asleep watching television. My e-reader, yes. The television, no.
I blink a few times and hold my breath as I turn my gaze to the side. I expect to see him lying beside me, all tanned, tattooed, dark, and sexy. But the bed is empty. Not just empty because he’s in the kitchen or on the balcony, but the never-been-slept-in kind of empty.
