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Wait.Mess. That’s it.
“Daaaaaad, why did you stop walking?” Kiera says.
“I think I know how to fix things,” I say.
At least I hope I do. Because if this doesn’t work, I don’t know what will.
27
AMELIA
Aweek after I turned Cole away for the last time, I’m wrapping up a meeting in a cafe with the web designer I’m working with. I had a meeting with a lawyer this morning, to talk me through the legal side of starting a new company. Tomorrow, I have a meeting with an old colleague who I’m hoping will be able to put me in touch with potential clients.
If I just keep moving, I don’t have to think about all the ways I feel woefully unprepared to be a single mom.
If I just keep moving, I don’t have to wonder if I made a mistake turning Cole away.
The same doubts have been running through my head and heart since Cole explained why he fired me.He wanted to get back together. Maybe he would have been happy about the pregnancy. And you’re going to have to tell him at some point anyway.
My current plan is to tell Cole when I make it past the first trimester.
Also, I need the time to get over him. So that, when I tell him, I don’t crumble if he still wants to get back together.
I’m sure Cole will be a great dad. He’s never let Kiera down, no matter how toxic his own dad gets.
But I need to face the truth. Bridgetwarnedme Cole was messed up about his dad, the first time we met. But I ignored it because some part of me thought it would be different with Cole.
It’s not though. He literallyfiredme. Even though I think he loves me.
The pain I felt when he lashed out because he thought I’d betrayed him...
If that’s how Cole loves, I don’t think I could survive it. If I’m trying to avoid heartbreak, I can’t go back to the one man guaranteed to break my heart over and over again.
My web designer packs up their laptop, lets me know she’ll be in touch, and heads out the door.
I’m about to follow suit when my phone rings with an unknown number.
“Hello, Amelia speaking,” I say.
“Amelia. This is Lucinda. Cole’s assistant.”
I tense. “Lucinda, I really don’t want to talk to Cole—”
“And you don’t have to,” she says smoothly. “I have your severance payment available for you to pick up. Could you come by today?”
The last place in the world I want to go right now is Ashford Marketing.
What if I run into Cole?
My heart lightens at the thought. Even after everything, the thought of seeing him again, even in passing, makes me feel better.
That’s how I know I’m not ready to go back to the office. “Can you do a direct deposit into my account?”
“I’m afraid you’ll have to come in person. Company policy for these types of payments. Since they can be quite...big.”
I sigh. I’m not sure how picking it up at the office is more secure than having them deposit my severance into my account. And I don’t even care about the money at this point. Kids need things like braces, and college funds, and diapers.
“Is Cole out of the office today?”
