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“How does Aspen feel about it? Will she go with you when you’re drafted? Or finish school here? ’Cause you know we’ll all help her with the baby. She won’t be alone. And you guys are moving into the house Cole is buying for us just off campus.” Panic crawled up my spine. I didn’t even know why. Maybe because I didn’t want to face what my future would look like without my brother. If he were in the NFL, he wouldn’t be there. It was selfish. I got that. And I hated myself for hoping Phoenix would wait to go.
It wasn’t even a question if he would be drafted. My brother had eyes on him every time he played. He was that good.
“Aspen has her business.” Phoenix glanced at the surfboards she’d painted and he’d mounted along the far wall. “It’s already succeeding. She’s on board with me declaring next year.”
“I’m happy for you. What team are you hoping for?”
He grinned, all the tension that’d bracketed his mouth melting away. “I want to stay in California. The Chargers will need a quarterback, Bernard isn’t renewing his contract. Rumor is he’s retiring.”
“I’ll have to keep an eye on their defense.” I wanted to be on the same team as my brother. If that wasn’t possible, then the 49ers. “What about Cole and Damon? I haven’t checked in with them lately.”
“I don’t know what teams they’re monitoring. But back toyounot knowing.” Phoenix’s eyes narrowed. “You’ve been MIA, which is understandable, but knock it off. We all care.”
It didn’t need to be said. Our cousins always had our backs. We grew up together and were more brothers than cousins. “I need to work off some frustration, and since I can’t do the fights anymore, I wanted to see if you or they were game to spar.”
“Always. You know that.” He bent, elbows on the counter, and leaned closer. “What’s really going on with you?”
“I’m good.” I blocked him as best as I could, but my brother had an inside track—our connection. “I just need the outlet, that’s all.”
“I’m calling bullshit.”
“Doesn’t matter. It’s a waiting game right now. You know that.”
“I don’t like it. We should do something to make it go away.”
I snorted. “Like what? Intimidate Luke’s parents? You know we wouldn’t do that. They lost their kid. They’re more than entitled to deal with it however they see fit.”
“Not when it comes to you.”
Everything fell away, and I knew he saw the darkness in me by how tense he got. “Even when it comes to me.”
The door opened, saving me from my brother’s inquisition. Aspen walked in with her best friend, Max, who dumped her bag on the coffee table. He hugged her, shouted hi to us, and headed out.
“Where’s Max off to?” Phoenix asked as Aspen came closer.
She patted me on the shoulder then went to my brother and looped her arms around his neck. Everything in him softened, and I ached for what they had. She was the epitome of a surfer chick. Sun-streaked blond hair, laid-back and happy vibe, golden tan, and toned everywhere from spending so much time in the water. Her blue eyes sparkled, and my brother melted whenever she was near.
“Max is meeting Jaxon but might return when you’re working out later.”
Phoenix kissed her then dropped his hands to her baby bump. They shared grins, and Aspen laughed before waving me over. “Come here, Shane. The baby’s kicking.”
I got up and went over, putting my hand where Aspen indicated. A soft bump pushed against her firm belly. It was the coolest thing I’d ever felt, and I laughed. “That’s incredible. I can’t wait to meet her.”
“Hopefully, not too soon,” Phoenix said.
He was worried.
I hit him in the shoulder. “Aspen’s got this. Stop stressing.”
I felt the snort that followed my comment. I would’ve been a wreck, too, had it been my wife and our first baby.
“Next year will be fun,” I said, staying positive. They didn’t need any more stress with the load they’d already shouldered. “All of us in one house and me being the favorite uncle.”
I stayed for another half hour, catching up and deciding against bringing up why I’d stopped by—Joe and the business he wanted to go into with us.
* * *
Igot in my SUV after hanging with Phoenix and Aspen and headed toward the closest car dealership. I shouldn’t even be contemplating it, but I was the family’s peacekeeper, and I couldn’t think of another way around it since Joe had refused to even look at the loan application.
