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“Maybebroken upis too formal since we really weren’t anything more than… lovers.”
“What the fuck, Frankie? We had a fight. That’s all.”
I shake my head. “No. It was more. I’d moved out. We were done. Even if you had been with that woman, it really wouldn’t have been cheating because I left you days before.”
“We weren’t fucking done.” Steam nearly rises from his ears. “We’ll never be done.”
“But we are. Don’t you see? It’s inevitable. Why string it out, make it more painful than it has to be?”
“Why are you doing this?” He looks around the room, motions to my body. “Why now, when you need me? You’re still in the fucking hospital. On painkillers. You shouldn’t be making rash decisions.”
“No. It’s not rash. I’d already made the decision the night before my trip.” I grip his hand. “Gabriel, my fall doesn’t wipe away what happened before I left. I’m a little freaked out from the accident and maybe you are too, but nothing has changed.”
“It has.”
“Really? What am I to you? What do you want from me?”
“I want you to come home. Let me take care of you.”
“But why?”
“What do you meanwhy?” He stands and paces before the end of the bed, tugging at his hair. “Because I want to!”
“I want to get married and have babies. Can you say the same?”
“Don’t do this, Angel.” Agitation flickers all around him like flames.
An image of Gabriel flashes before my eyes, not the one before me now but the one on his back tattoo. The avenging angel, wings spread, sword and shield at the ready as flames lick at his feet. Agony contorting his face as the angry flames grow higher, consuming him slowly, painfully.
I flinch from the sight of it, sorrow taking my breath, tears taking my sight.
He’s at my side before I can catch my breath. “Are you in pain? Here—” He pushes the button to release more pain meds. “We shouldn’t be doing this now. You just woke up after being unconscious for two days.”
“Are you going to want children next week? Next month? Next year?”
“Don’t.” He draws back like I landed a fatal blow. I suppose I have.
“Loyal. Brave. True.” I finger his tattoo under the sleeve of his t-shirt. “You are all those things, Gabriel. Except when it comes to your heart, you keep it closed off, sheltered, unavailable.” I swipe my tears away. “I wasted nine years of my life on Austin, believing we had a future, a shared futurehewanted as well. I can’t do that again. Iwon’tdo that again.”
“Please.” Gabriel’s pleading eyes watering nearly do me in. I’ve never seen Gabriel cry. Such a strong beast of a man brought to his knees by his inability to love me.
“I know you’re capable of love. I’ve seen the love you have for your mom and sister. It’s inside you. I know you care about me. I feel it. You’re too afraid to let it out. Tell me there’s a chance, and I’ll wait. I’ll try.”
He shakes his head and stands, turning away from me, tucking his emotions back in place behind his armored heart and hard façade. “I can’t give you what I don’t have.” The coolness in his tone matches that of his heart.
“Truth,” I quote his tattoo under my breath. “Then this is goodbye.”
Braveis what I am as I watch him walk out the door without so much as looking back.
There’s no need to look when there’s no one there you care about.
Then this is goodbye.Her voice haunts me as anger has me shaking with the need to smash something—hit someone. Hard.
Walking out her door was the hardest thing I’ve ever done. What could I say? I wouldn’t lie to her. She deserves better than that. She asked for truth. I gave her my truth, and she didn’t want it.
No, she wanted more.
Fuck!
