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Breathe out. Don’t cry, Galantia.
“That’s my good girl,” Risa said with a smile and righted herself, taking my hand into hers. “Better?”
“A little.” I blinked away my tears and forced my lungs into an even rhythm, just like she’d taught me. “Will you still take me to the orchard? Outside the walls? Please?”
“This once, and only briefly. Come now.”
She guided me along the balcony. When we descended the stairs, one of the chapel’s bells tolled. By the time we reached the inner sanctum at the bottom, both bells rang until my ears ached.
“It’s so loud.” When the stable boys and guards clapped in celebration, I held her hand tighter. “Did the bells ring when I was born?”
“Your lord father wasn’t here the day you came into this world; he was gathering bannermen for King Barat before he came home to see the little lady.”
“Did he command the bells to ring, then? When he finally came and saw me?”
Her lips narrowed until she finally shook her head. “No bells.”
No bells.
That tingle in my face was back, creeping toward my eyes, my ears, my mouth, itching me until my lips parted on their own accord. “They cheer for my brother as if he’s the prince himself. He’sugly.”
“Galantia!” Risa scolded. “How can you say such a terrible thing? And about your own brother?”
My feet dragged heavily over the crushed seashells as we passed the western wall, the kennels quiet since Father had gone out to hunt earlier. “I’m sorry. I don’t know why I said that.”
I’d wanted a brother or sister since forever. Someone to play catch with, hide and seek, read books to. Anything to pass the boring hours where I wasn’t allowed to run, to ride… or even play with the servants’ children.
It was always just Risa and me.
During bad storms, she allowed me to come to her bed. Sometimes, she even hid me away under a servant girl’s dress and took me to the beach, letting me play with the waves for hours.
My heart expanded at those thoughts.
Still, it never felt quite full.
Always felt a bit… empty.
Risa stopped and turned to me, narrowed lips slowly lifting into a soft smile. “You will ask the gods for forgiveness before you go to bed tonight.”
“I will,” I said, ears pricking at an ominous howl, like when the wind cut across the gaps in the cliffs where seagulls nested. “I promise.”
“Good,” she said. “It’s not decent to speak of…”
She said more after that, but her voice faded away under another howl coming from a black gap in the door beside us. A bad smell drifted on the current, like the hound dung from the kennels mixed with the stench of the innards Father fed them after a hunt.
The dungeons.
My stomach clenched.
My chest, however, lifted ever so curiously. It did that sometimes when I passed by this place. Maybe because of the noises coming from the inside? I heard them through the stones when I snuck away sometimes. Moaning. Grunting.
Crying.
“Whatever is it now, child?” Risa gave a tug on my arm, and when I only stumbled forward a single step, her gaze followed my line of sight. “Never go down there. Do you hear me, Galantia?”
I kept staring at the slit of gaping darkness. “What’s in there? Thieves?”
“I’ll tell you what’s in there,” she whispered and held my gaze with shivering resolve. “Rats!” A laugh escaped her at the way I jumped, then she tugged me back into motion. “Rats as big as the corn ears in the larder!”
