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But most of all, I give him the strength of these two little beings in my belly.
The beings that we made.
Out of love.
Whatever we may have called it in that moment, it was always love.
For each other.
“Say it,” I command with my rounded belly resting against his pelvis.
“Tempest —”
“Say that you love me too, Ledger.”
He swallows quite possibly for the millionth time. That’s jerky as well.
His Adam’s apple bobs thickly, awkwardly.
“I’m…” he breathes out, his eyes boring into mine.
I give him a small, serene smile. “You don’t have to be afraid. I’ve got you.”
“I’m not good at this.”
“It’s okay. I’ll hold your hand and keep you safe, until you do.”
His forehead comes to rest against mine. “I-I’m going to hurt you. I know that.”
“I’ll tell you when you do so you can make it better.”
His hands spring into action and grab my thickened waist. “I can’t… I can’t promise you that I won’t make you cry.”
“We’ll make sure to stock up on tissues and cotton candy ice cream.”
“I don’t know if I can be what you need me to be.”
“You already are.”
“I —”
“Say it,” I command again, this time pressing my belly into his pelvis.
And his fingers spread open on my waist as he whispers, like he was dying to and all he needed was a little push over the edge, “I-I love you too.”
Before I can respond to that, he does something else like he was dying to do that as well.
Kiss me.
And because I’ve been dying for it as well, I let him do it.
I let him devour my mouth so I can devour his back. I let him taste me so I can taste him back. So I can feel him invade my mouth like he’s invaded my heart and my soul since the first moment I saw him.
So I can be in his arms for the first time ever without anything separating us.
Not his lies, not mine.
Not his fear, not mine.
Just us.
Although just us isn’t true, is it?
Because we do have some things between us.
Two things, in fact.
And those cute little things decide that this is the time to make their presence known, making their mommy smile and their daddy break apart from Mommy’s mouth.
Startled, he goes, “What was…”
I chuckle when I feel them kick just beneath my belly button, startling Ledger again. “Them.”
His kiss-swollen lips part. “The b-babies?”
“Uh-huh.”
I feel another kick and this time he moves apart a little and looks down at my swollen stomach. And he looks at it in a way that makes me think he’s actually waiting for them to pop out of there any second now. He’s actually waiting to see a real foot poking through my clothes.
When it happens again, he breathes, “Fuck me. They’re…”
“Very active, yeah.” I grin. “All the techs always tell me that they’re the most active babies they’ve seen in a while.”
His eyes jerk up to mine then, his fists opening and closing around my waist. “He never… Reed never told me that. I –”
I put my hands on his, making him let go of my dress and bring them up front.
Where his babies are making a ruckus.
Then, “Reed doesn’t know everything.”
His fingers shake and grip my belly like he’ll never let go.
Good.
I don’t want him to.
Then in the next second, I’m the one getting startled because he’s down on his knees. Just like the time back in the cabin when he was touching my bump for the first time. Like he couldn’t hold himself up any longer. And before I can absorb that, he leans forward and rests his forehead against my bump as if in worship.
I sink my fingers in his hair and he looks up. “Thank you.”
“For what?”
“For letting me touch them. Even when I’m not –”
I press a finger on his lips. “You are. For me. For them.”
At this, something happens that I’ve never seen before. That I never even imagined I’d ever see. His usually dark brown eyes – pitch black right now though – fill with something akin to tears. They go red-rimmed and his jaw clenches with emotion.
And then he presses a kiss on my belly.
I don’t know if this is divine intervention or if the universe is just so beautiful sometimes that you get all your dreams coming true. Because at his kiss, I feel another kick in my belly right at that spot and this time, he chuckles.
And does it again and again and again.
Until he’s covered my entire belly in his sweet kisses and I’m laughing and crying and flying in joy. Like he is. Picking me up then, he puts me on his old bed and keeps kissing me over and over until I’m all liquid under his hard body.
“I could get used to this bed,” I say, chuckling when he lets me come up for air.
