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This is so far off from any alternative version I had of the plan.
Getting married in Vegas.
Falling in love with my husband.
Staying married despite my own fears.
I managed to ride with it.
But this?
Can I make room for another woman’s child? For another woman to be so involved in my life and in Hansley’s life because of that child?
It doesn’t matter that people do so every day.
That there might be healthy baby-mama relationships out in the world.
I don’t want to be in one.
I don’t want to be constantly reminded that, days before he married me, my husband was screwing someone else.
He interlaced their fingers.
He breathed sweet words in her ear.
He teased her body until she moaned in ecstasy.
It’ll drive me crazy.
Maybe that makes me immature or picky.
I don’t care.
This is my life.
And this isn't the path I wanted it to take.
Hansley moves a step toward me, his face crumpled and stressed. He looks torn up. And if this wasn’t all happening because of him, I would have given a damn.
But right now, it’s hard to consider his feelings when he’s responsible for all the pain flooding my body.
“It was before I met you, Asia. The moment we met at Make It Marriage, that very second, it ruined me. I couldn’t look at any other woman. I ended it with Svena. And then I met you in Vegas…”
“How many others?”
He blinks. “What?”
“How many,” I push slowly to my feet, “of your little flings are going to show up with baby bumps?” My nostrils flare. “How many times will I have to hold my breath when a beautiful woman that you used to ‘know’ turns up in front of us?” My throat tightens. “Is it tens? Or hundreds?” I let out a bitter laugh. “Am I number one hundred and one?”
“You mean more to me than all those women.”
I shake my head, unable to look at him. Unable to believe him.
“Svena was a mistake,” he says firmly.
“How many mistakes have you made, Hansley!” My voice climbs in volume. “How many?”
“Asia, you’re probably feeling upset and—”
