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“Am I going too slow?” he whispers.
“No, mate. Doesn’t have to be frenzied.”
His smile cracks wide. “I’ve been frenzied. And desperate. And selfish. I had no hope of holding on to you two, so I grabbed for anything I could get. You must think I’m terrible in bed.”
“That night wasn’t a shining moment.” Looking back on it now, I realize I wasn’t at my best, either. I had a point to prove; I proved it. I didn’t care how I hurt Darwin doing it. “Not for any of us.”
Darwin eases his body a little closer, so his thighs brush mine, as he continues to pet my breasts. His touch is still light, still gentle, a swirl of flame over my skin, but the effect on me is intense. There’s a slowly-gathering storm between my legs.
“I’d like to start anew with you, Teddy,” he says. “I don’t want things between us to be brutish. I want beauty. Does that make any sense?”
I nod. It makes perfect sense. The love Darwin’s been shown has been cruel. That’s what he’s known; that’s what he’s given back. He wants something different; I’m happy to help him create that.
“I want to play with you,” he says, his fingertips catching on my nipples and tugging very slightly. “But I never want you to be afraid of me. I never want to look into your eyes and see fear or distrust. I’ve seen that so often and it’s killed me every time. I want...”
He trails off, and I can tell he’s scared of admitting what he wants.
“You want love,” I supply.
He nods.
“I need that more than anything else,” he whispers. “I did it all wrong with Gabe. I broke his trust. I told myself what I was doing was justified because he’s actually a very strong bottom and needs a strong top. But I was wrong. The emotions became so muddled. I think he might have hated me before you broke my glamor and took him back, Teddy.”
I don’t tell him he’s right. Fear of repeating his mistakes is glittering in his eyes. And he’s trying; he’s really trying. This is another of those moments where if I slap his hand away, he might never reach out again.
“Does it help if I tell you I’m not afraid of you doing that with me?”
He blinks in surprise. “I—yes—you’re not?”
“No. You’re being honest with me, admitting how you feel, what you’re afraid of. That’s all I need from you. Just honesty. That’s what lets me trust you. I can see how hard you’re trying. So can Gabe. I know he hurt you this afternoon by turning you down. Try to see past the rejection. He washonestwith you. He felt he could be because of how much you’ve opened up to us.”
“Painful progress?” he asks.
“Yeah.”
“Is there anything you don’t want me to do tonight?”
That he’s asked lets me relax and give up that last ounce of control to him. “No. I’m all yours.”
His eyes flare brighter than the full moon. “Teddy,” he breathes. “You really trust me that much?”
This is where I show him I love him. And I do. I’ve always had strong feelings about Darwin, right from the moment we met. The change in those feelings from murderous to concerned to caring has been slow, even a little torturous, but it’s there. We still have things to work out and we’ll probably always clash a little, because we’re so alike. But I can give myself over to him, be submissive to him sexually, the way he needs, without fear. I can show him love.
“I do.” I’m careful not to qualify it.
“Would you—I want to look at you. Undress for me?”
It’s a question, but it’s also a command. There’s just the smallest edge in his voice. A tiny nip of control.
“Yes, Darwin,” I say.
Chapter37
The Barefoot Prince
Iunhook my bra and shrug the straps off my shoulders. The lacy cups sag into his hands and he lifts his fingers enough for it to fall to the floor before he returns to teasing my nipples with his thumbs.
I wish there was a bit more for him to play with since Darwin, like Charlie, seems to be a breast man. But he doesn’t complain. His eyes are a burning silver and his jeans are tented, so I guess the little I have is enough.
