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“Do I belong to the Kings or…” My words were cut short by Truck walking in.
“You ready, Queen Ju?” Truck paused when he saw the way King and I were standing. Him, pressing me into the wall and me with my hands at his throat. “King, back the fuck up, man,” Truck frowned.
“She needed some discipline,” King said, sniffing and backing away awkwardly. His dick was hard. Had to be. “Y'all go head on your shopping trip. I’ll call if there’s business. I’m headed to meet with the lower levels. Pretty Boy is already there.” He left the room in a hurry and I smirked a little. I still had his ass and he knew he still had me.
…
“Let’s grab tacos,” I said pulling up at a restaurant. Truck and I had been out for hours and I’d definitely caught him staring at my ass more than a few times. He was always a gentleman though. Always respectful, never even touching me when he didn’t give me an impromptu hug. Hugging was Truck’s thing. I didn’t mind. He was so pure that hugging him didn’t bother me like it would if it were anyone else.
“I’m treating, Juju,” Truck told me when the server sat our plates down.
“Lucky for you, I refuse to pay for my own meal when I’m out with a man.” I smiled at him and he grinned. Big and wide and happy. “Truck, can we talk?” I sighed after my first bite of a delicious grilled fish taco.
“What’s up, Ju?” I looked into his soft brown eyes and smiled a little. He was so handsome. Light brown skin with thick dark brows set over kind eyes with dark lashes that curled up like he should have been in a mascara ad.
I looked down at his king of hearts pendant and tried to situate my words so they didn’t sting.
“You know I love you, right Truck?”
“I know. I’m your fucking favorite.”
“You are,” I laughed. “I want us to always be close. You’re my brother. I’d lay down my life for you but…” I paused, my taco mid-way to my mouth.
“But what?” A small frown pinched between his thick brows. “Did I do something?” I could see his wheels clicking and turning while he tried to figure out what he did.
“No, you didn’t do anything,” I said, hurrying to reassure him. “I just want to make sure we don’t get our signals crossed. I love you as a brother, Truck. That’s all.” Usually, my words came out quicker than my thoughts but with Truck, I had to be soft and gentle. Iwantedto be that way with him.
His eyes fell to the table and he nodded. “You think I’m feeling you,” he said knowingly.
“Am I wrong?” I asked, around a bite of taco.
“Yes and no.” He shrugged broad, boxy shoulders. “Sometimes I look at you and I love you so much like a sister. Then sometimes…I see you in a dress and no bra and…” He tilted his head from one side to the other. A laugh escaped me at his expression.
“So you’re a man like the rest of the men we run with,” I said.
“Yeah. I don’t know, Ju. My feelings aren’t always easy to sort out. I know everyone told me I’m autistic so sometimes shit just…doesn’t make sense. I’m not stupid though.”
“I never said you were, Truck.”
“I know…I just get defensive when I can’t get my thoughts out as quickly as everyone else. I know I like you.” He looked at me, shyness evident in the way he looked at something else immediately after. “I…love you. But I love you both ways sometimes and I know it’s fucked up because King already laid claim to you but…”
“Woah, what?” I laughed, covering my mouth with a napkin. “King hasn’t laid claim to shit.” Truck shot me an incredulous look. “He hasn’t! We stopped fucking more than a month ago, Truck. You know that. I’m a brother now. No fucking.”
“Like I said, he laid claim to you. I can’t keep my feelings in check sometimes. My head gets jumbled. Sometimes shit outside of my head moves too fast and sometimes shit inside of my head moves too fast. Either way, I know I’d die for you, Jupiter.”
I reached across the table and held his hand because his words touched my heart. I heard the sincerity in them. “So sometimes you can’t help which one of your feelings pop out?” I asked him, curious about his thought process.
“Exactly. Sometimes I’ll hug you and it’ll start as me hugging you like a sister but then…” He rubbed the back of his neck and pushed out a breath. “You’re beautiful. I’m sorry.”
“Truck…goddammit. Don’t make me get all mushy. You know I’m a thug,” I laughed. I moved to sit beside him at the small table on the patio. I had to hug him.
My brother.
“Listen,” I said, my arms around him. “Try to keep it in the realm of sibling love, okay? King is picking up on your crush. He asked me to check you.” I kissed his cheek and he held on to me a little tighter, not wanting to let go.
“It’s not a crush. I love you. I’ll keep it in check though. I know who you belong to. That’s my brother. I’d never disrespect you or him.” He pulled back and looked at me before stabbing at his cup of street corn like a little kid. “If I wasn’t retarded…and you weren’t with King.” He swallowed a ball of nerves. “You think you could ever…love me too?”
My heart broke into a million pieces.
