AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“All right,” she said. “Six weeks. I’ll try. But if the date’s horrible, I’m telling you so. No disregarding my feedback.”
“Done,” Martin said. “I’m staggering to the car now. Sweat is sexy on Ezra. Too bad it doesn’t feel sexy on me. But see? I’m doing it anyway. I’m making an effort for love.”
5
INAPPROPRIATE OBSERVATIONS
Beckett pulled into the carpark of the YMCA two days after his first court appearance as a defendant. It was an unseasonably warm early-autumn Saturday, the sky the deepest blue over the darkness of the mountains, and his heart did two things at once. It lifted, because how could it not, and it contracted, too. There was snow on top of those mountains already despite the temperature down here, and there’d be snow on the ground here soon enough. Their new rental house wasn’t going to be ready until mid-December, he’d learned yesterday afternoon, and they could only live in Brett Hunter’s loaner for three more weeks. He needed new housing, and he needed it fast. He should have started getting that sorted already, but instead, he was here.
He’d had a dream last night, too, that he couldn’t quite remember, but the last part had involved him trying to hold onto Abby. She’d been going over a cliff, something like that. He’d tried to haul her up, but he’d kept failing. His hands slipping, losing her wrists and taking her hands, and the moment when her hands had started sliding through his own. He remembered her face, looking up at him. Those blue eyes that trusted him.
He'd woken up before she’d fallen, gasping with relief that it was just a dream. Then he’d remembered that she was gone.
They should make something, some pill, that gave you amnesia at night.
He put the SUV in Park, opened the door, and said, “OK. Let’s do this.”
“I wish we could’ve brought Bacon,” Troy said, when Beckett opened his door. “Bacon would make me brave, becausehe’sbrave. He’s little, but he’s not scared ofanything.”
“That’s because he’s half Chihuahua,” Janey said. “And Chihuahuas don’t know they’re little. They think they’re tough.”
“Small but mighty,” Beckett said. He remembered holding Janey that first time, feeling the strength and solidity andtherenessof her in his palms, hearing her newborn wails and watching her eyes opening to take in this new world. He’d hadn’t known how much a kid could reach into your heart. He hadn’t known hehadthat much heart. Now, he knew. He said, “Made it here today, didn’t you? Reckon that’s brave.”
“But I’mscared,”Troy said, clutching his towel more closely to him.
“Dad says it’s OK to be scared,” Janey said. “We’ll sit close and watch you.”
“If I get too scared,” Troy said, “can I get out?”
Beckett wished he knew the right answer. He didn’t, so he said, “If you need a break, you can get out for a cuddle.”
“OK,” Troy said, then took a deep breath and scrambled out of the car.
Beckett took his hand and said, “Good on ya, mate.” Troy looked smaller than ever in his blue togs, sweatshirt, and thongs, his twin cowlicks sticking up more as his hair grew out, and the closer they got to the building, the more he hung back.
Was this a good idea? Or a terrible one? The pediatrician had said, at Troy’s appointment last week—after Troy had started to cry when the doctor asked him whether his dad had taken him to the lake this summer, and Beckett had explained Troy’s fears—“There’s a class at the Y’s Aquatic Center on Saturdays for reluctant swimmers. ‘Gentle Swim,’ it’s called, and the teacher’s excellent. You may want to give that a try.” Beckett had thought,Why not?and signed the whole family up that day.
Out through the locker rooms, now, keeping Troy’s hand firmly in his own, then meeting Janey at the other side. The familiar smell of chlorine hanging in the air, the sound of shouts, of hands and feet slapping water, echoing in the cavernous space. Four lanes with swimmers powering up and down or barely making progress between the rope floats, and two lanes with no rope, marked off with cones. And a mother and daughter sitting on a bench just back from the two-lane area, both of them in their togs.
Beckett led the kids over there, sat down at the end of the bench, leaned forward, and said, “Your daughter here for Gentle Swim too?” He addressed the girl, who was about Janey’s age. “My boy’s name is Troy. What’s yours?”
He always felt stupid being hearty and over-friendly like that, like some cardigan-wearing git on an American TV show from 1965 and no Aussie bloke ever, and women tended to look a bit startled when he did it, too. The world of kids was still run by mothers, though, and if he didn’t go out of his way to seem harmless, Janey and Troy wouldn’t be invited anywhere.
“Alexis,” the girl said. She was a sturdy-looking girl with straight brown hair. “I’m not the one taking lessons. I know how to swim already. It’s my mom. I’m being her moral support. You know, saying, ‘Go, Mom!’ and generally cheering for her. I wear my swimsuit so she knows I’ll jump in with her if she needs me to. You’re not allowed to get in with them, but I tell Mom I’ll jump in anyway if she starts to drown or anything. It makes her less scared.”
Janey said, “That’s cool,” looking a little awed at finding somebody even more take-charge than herself.
The woman, a blonde, said, “I’m Paula,” and stuck out a hand to Beckett. “And I know, it sounds ridiculous. I’m a grown woman.” She tried to laugh, but couldn’t quite do it.
“No worries,” Beckett said. “Everybody’s scared of something. Beckett here, and this is Janey.”
“Where are you from?” Paula asked. “What’s that accent?” With a spark of something more than fear in her eyes. Ah. That was the downside of the over-friendly thing.
Fortunately, Alexis waved at a dark-haired boy coming out of the locker-room door. “That’s Caleb. He’sreallyscared. I told him I’d be his moral support too, because he’s only eight, and his dad’s kind of mean about him being scared.”
“I’m being moral support for my brother, I guess,” Janey said. “I didn’t know they let adults do this class too. I thought it was just for kids.”
“It’s for everybody.” The voice came from behind them, and Beckett turned, then stood up.
