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He leaned down and scooped her up off the floor, carrying her to the leather wingback in front of the fire before sitting down and situating her on his lap. “Talk to me, Amelia. I can’t help if I don’t know what you’re thinking.”
Amelia chose, for the moment, to take the solace he offered. “I don’t know what I’m thinking, either. My thoughts are all jumbled in some kind of chaotic tempest that threatens to become a full-on, raging storm. I keep having flashes back to when the snow leopard came forward. She charged at me and then leaped. I honestly thought she was trying to kill me.”
“I’m sorry she frightened you. I suspect she is, too. Taking over like that is not something that happens unless your alter ego believes you are in mortal danger.”
“You weren’t trying to kill me.”
“You know that now, but that part of your brain that is still primitive saw an apex predator in the same room and hit the panic button. Your snow leopard responded to that.”
She nodded, laying her head on his chest. “That makes sense, I suppose. I have to admit that shift coming over me was the most frightening thing I’ve ever experienced.”
“Even more than knowing your plane was going to crash?”
“Very much so. I’ve been trained on how to handle a disabled plane or even a helicopter. Having a snow leopard charge me was not something I ever even considered as within the realm of possibilities.”
“Understandable. I was kind of surprised when you stopped so close to the cabin. And then the look you gave me—” He chuckled. “—had more malicious intent than just about anything I’ve ever experienced. I’ve stared down terrorists who looked at me with more compassion.”
“She was, and still is, pretty pissed at you. She’s buying the whole you-had-no-choice thing, but she feels like you could have handled it better. Is it weird I’m talking about her like she’s this real thing and kind of separate?”
“Not at all. She is real, and she is separate. She is also a part of you. The more you can integrate yourself with her, the better off you’ll be. That can be difficult for those who are turned…”
“Have you turned that many?”
“Not at all. You’re the first. It isn’t something honorable shifters do without cause…”
“And you’re an honorable shifter?” she teased.
“I am. Shifters also don’t normally turn someone without their consent. We take the thought of someone losing their humanity seriously. Even if death is the only other known alternative, it isn’t something we do lightly. For me, the thought of losing you was more than I could bear. I would rather you lived and hated me than let you die.”
The calm vehemence of his tone spoke volumes about the dilemma he had been faced with. He had violated a very basic tenant of who he was in order to save her life.
“I don’t hate you. It’s just a lot to take in. And the sex?”
He chuckled and gave her the most devilish grin. “You’re a beautiful woman, and you didn’t say no. I may be honorable, but I am no man’s fool. Besides, you are my fated mate.”
“That’s pretty self-serving, don’t you think?”
“Most definitely.”
She wasn’t sure why, but something about his self-effacing honesty struck her as admirable, humorous, and endearing.
“It was weird—not the sex, which was great by the way, but the shift.”
“I imagine it would be as you had no point of reference, and your snow leopard meant to protect you and believed you were in danger.”
“You really don’t want me to be angry with her, do you?”
He shook his head. “No. I promise you; she was only trying to protect you.”
“I think seeing you shift helped. I sort of knew what it was when I started. Can you shift on the run?”
“Yes, but it takes practice. It isn’t a bad skill to learn. The vortex created by the shift offers you some degree of protection, but only for that part of you that is obscured by the shift.”
“I was a little fearful when it started. I thought it might hurt, but it didn’t. I wouldn’t say it tickled but you could feel the power and a kind of electrical buzz, or no, more like champagne bubbles fizzing up and down my body.”
She paused for a moment and then continued. “I think the oddest thing was looking down through what I saw as my own eyes and seeing a spotted fur coat—and then realizing I had retractable claws and that I could flick my tail.”
He smiled at the memory. “You were quite regal, looking down on me.”
