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I wrap my arms around her, digging my head into her chest. Mama’s a small woman. At ten, I’m already almost to her shoulders. She was so much smaller than Daddy and everyone says I’ll take after him with my height. I hope not. He was huge.
“I love you, Evie,” Mama whispers, kissing my head as she runs her fingers through my crazy curls, so much like her own. “Always and forever.”
I snuggle deeper, content to never let go. “I love you infinity more.”
She tickles me. “Dream on.” Giggling, I pull away and she gives me a quick tap on my tush to get me moving. “I have to grab my stuff upstairs. Do me a favor and get the sunscreen from your bathroom, please?”
With a nod, I skip back to my room and into the bathroom. I toss the sunscreen into my bag, but my eyes catch on Roman’s bedroom door, the one that leads to our shared bathroom. Guilt churns in my gut. It’s family day at the lake with the neighbors. He should be there.
Swallowing hard, I set my bag on the counter and knock before I chicken out. He’s always so moody.
“What?” he snaps.
I grip the handle and pull the door open an inch. His room is dark, like always. “Roman?” I say softly, trying to keep my voice light and happy, like Mama’s. “It’s Evie.”
“No shit,” he growls. I gasp at the curse and open the door another inch, just in time to see him roll his eyes.
“Don’t swear,” I admonish.
“Don’t swear,” he mocks in a fake girl voice. He glances up at me and smirks behind the curtain of hair. “Fuck.”
I glare at him. “You’re a godless heathen.”
Completely unbothered, he shrugs and goes back to reading.
I think he wants me to be scared of him, but I’m not. How could I be? He’s sad, just like me. Just like Mama. God says we should never judge others and always forgive them.
So I do.
Pulling the door open fully, I let the bathroom light spill into his room. Like I expected, he’s sitting on his window seat with an old book in his hands. He’s dressed in all black, his dark hair messy and covering his face. The curtains are parted just enough to give him light to read, but not enough to actually see his room.
“You wanna come to the lake with us?” I ask, biting my lip and wringing my hands. “It’s a nice day outside.”
“It’s hot,” he grunts, shifting deeper into his little cacoon.
Giggling, I state the obvious. “That’s why we’re going swimming, silly.”
Roman huffs and lifts his book. “I’m reading. Go away.”
“You’re always reading,” I point out.
He grumbles, “And you’re always talking.”
I smile and lean on the doorframe. “If you’re going to read in the window, maybe you should open it?” My brows dip low and I point a finger at the huge window next to him, the one that looks right out at the lake. It’s such a pretty view. He should enjoy it more. Maybe if he did, he wouldn’t be so sad.
His head jerks up, making his hair swish back, granting me my first view of his face in days. “Maybe you should get the fuck out,” he hisses, throwing a pillow. I slam the door just before it hits me.
As though it’s happening in real time, the bang of the bathroom door closing jars me from my flashback, throwing me into the present. Tears steadily fall down my cheeks from the intensity of it all. I let them fall, knowing there’s no stopping them.
Sitting in Ro’s room, his leather and musk scent still heavy in the air, brings me right back to where it all started. When I was just an innocent kid mourning the loss of her father, and he was just a moody twelve-year-old with an attitude problem and penchant for dark rooms and old books.
God, how things have changed.
My eyes scan the room until I get to his overflowing bookshelves, taking in the finer details I missed before. Trinkets, books, papers and junk line the old wood, but his favorite books were always in a stack by his bed. I land on his trophy collection and my stomach sours.
He hated them. No one knows that but me.
As much of a jock as Isaac wanted him to be, Roman wasn’t. His soul ached the way only an artists’ can. He was always so silent, so involved in the world in his head. I was jealous. What was it like up there? I knew whatever it was, it was beautiful. That it was better than the real world.
