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“I don’t even understand how it’s possible to do,” I said to the other three healers in the wake of the failed lessons.
We were all gathered on the back porch, enjoying the mild weather as we worked. Even Ember had ventured out of my room for her sleep and was curled up at my feet, although Phoenix was nowhere in sight.
Due to our continued efforts to eradicate the epidemic, it was a rare event for all four of us to be together. But when my attempts to teach them individually had failed, Hayes had insisted on one final session all together, just in case that somehow brought a breakthrough.
“I always thought my wall was made from my healing power,” I said. “How could someone from a different affinity create one?”
“We must have been wrong about its source,” Clay said thoughtfully. “It must come from the body itself—it’s just your power that controls bringing it up and down.”
“If you think about it, it does make some sense.” Hayes sounded fascinated despite our failure. “We know the body develops a resistance to healing power over time—both due to age and due to excessive healing. So we know everyone has the innate ability to resist our power. This must just be another aspect of that natural ability.”
“Do you think non-healers could learn to activate their own wall?” Luna asked.
Hayes narrowed his eyes. “That’s less clear. My instinct is no. Non-healers can’t control their resistance to healing, unfortunately, so I don’t see why they would be able to control this. Delphine uses her power to raise and lower the wall, but a non-healer can’t connect with their body that way.”
“Except a healer can’t control their own natural resistance either, can they?” I asked.
Hayes and Clay exchanged a look, making my stomach sink, although I couldn’t explain why.
“It’s a bit more complicated than that,” Hayes said. “Healers can’t prevent the natural resistance of old age. If we could, we would never die except through the occasional accident. But when it comes to the resistance created by repeated healings, healers do have a heightened ability to push past it—particularly when healing themselves.
“That’s good,” I said, unsure why he and Clay looked so concerned.
“But there are still limits to that,” Clay said gently.
I nodded. It made sense. No one had ever claimed healers were impervious to everything except old age.
“We’re worried about you, Delphine,” Hayes said when I clearly still wasn’t getting it.
“Me?” I stared at him. “What do you mean?”
Hayes grimaced. “You’ve had an unusually dramatic apprenticeship.”
“You certainly have!” Luna’s expression caught up to the worry on the faces of the men. “I’ve nearly completed mine, and I’ve barely had to heal myself the whole time. I think at most I’ve intervened in the early stages of a few infections I picked up at the hospital. But you’ve had so many run-ins with Grey!” She shuddered.
“I’m particularly concerned about the attack from the Constantine son,” Hayes said. “You did what you had to do to survive—and it was an ingenious solution, I must add—but it was far beyond a normal healing, even in the case of extreme injury. And it came after a number of other significant healings…”
“Have you noticed any difference since?” Clay asked. “Do you need more power when you heal yourself from small things?”
My hand moved of its own accord to rub at the back of my head where the youth from town had struck me.
“I don’t think so?” I said hesitantly. “Not that I’ve noticed—although I haven’t been paying attention.”
“That’s good.” Clay sounded pleased. “Your natural strength should give you a high ability to push past the resistance. But you can’t get complacent. You’re young—very young—and you still have your whole life ahead of you. If things continue as they have been, you could soon find that even your strength isn’t enough.”
I gulped. “You mean it might get to the point where I can’t even heal myself?”
“It’s possible,” Hayes said before rushing to add, “We don’t mean to alarm you! But you need to be warned. I’ve already spoken to Amara about the matter, and she agreed that it made sense for us to talk to you about the issue.”
“Oh.” I swallowed. “Thank you for warning me. I’ll try to be more careful.”
I looked up, and my eyes caught on Nik, frozen in the doorway. From the horrified look on his face, he’d caught the latter part of our conversation.
I looked back at the others. “We’re going to go back to the mainland and deal with Grey once and for all.” I was speaking more for Nik’s benefit than theirs. “And that will be an end to all the violence.”
Luna agreed enthusiastically, but I wasn’t sure if that was because she’d also seen Nik hovering in the doorway.
He cleared his throat, his expression closing off. “Amara asked me to fetch you all for the meal. She wants to take the chance to eat together to discuss where we’re up to with the epidemic and the next steps for management.”
