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“I guess you need to change if we’re doing the surf machine.”
She didn’t seem to have caught me staring. “Oh, right. Should I meet you there?”
“Maybe I’ll change too.” I waved a hand over my torso. “This is probably too much.”
Jenna started for the elevator. “I think it’s really wise to avoid UV exposure. I wish I’d thought to bring a rashguard.”
I followed her inside the box, stepping over a plate on the floor engraved with “Saturday.” “We could probably buy one on the ship if you want.”
“It’s fine.” She flashed a smile. “I’ll just wear a lot of sunblock.”
I hit the button for our floor, the elevator doors closed on us, then I turned to Jenna. “We keep meeting here, ma’am.”
Despite the weakness of the joke, Jenna’s warm laugh made me feel as charming as Everett Hardcastle. “I guess elevators are kind of our thing, aren’t they? Thank goodness this one doesn’t seem likely to break down.”
Somehow the idea of being trapped in an elevator with Jenna didn’t seem that bad. We’d have a good excuse to avoid Mom and Frank, and I’d definitely be safe from skin cancer in there. And I was starting to realize Jenna was one of the few people I could possibly stand to be with for hours on end.
As I waited for Jenna to change in her room, I silently deliberated about wearing my rashguard to the wave machine. I didn’t want to embarrass Jenna, but we’d reached the time of day when UV radiation was strongest. She’d said it was okay, though, so I kept it on, cinching the sun hat a little bit tighter under the chin.
Jenna appeared in a red bathing suit that looked like it could have come straight from the 1940s; wide straps, shorts, and what I was pretty sure was called a sweetheart neckline. I hadn’t given much thought to the whispered conversation she’d had with her roommate about bikinis outside my door because I’d seen the cruise in the light of a business arrangement, and what did it matter to me what she wore? But as I tried to focus on objects around the rather boring room while also stealing glances at Jenna, I thought she’d made a really good choice of swimwear, no matter Ellie’s opinion.
She started rubbing sunblock on the back of her neck, and unlike the industrial bottle I’d ordered off the internet, hers smelled amazing, with notes of tropical fruit and smoky caramel. “Sorry, I won’t take too long.”
I swallowed hard. “Take your time.” I had to say something to distract myself. “Um, what kind of sunblock is that?”
“It’s something Ellie got me from a skincare boutique on the Upper East Side.” Jenna grinned sheepishly. “I didn’t even want to know how much it cost.” She reached her hand behind her back and tried to put the lotion in the space between her shoulder blades.
Should I offer to help? I’d promised her there wouldn’t be any touching, but she’d taken my handandtouched my knee. Besides, I was pretty sure a friend would assist with applying sunblock. “I could, uh... do you want me to get that for you? Or not...”
“Yes, please!” Jenna eagerly extended the bottle to me and turned around. “I never can reach that spot.”
I put a dime-sized amount on my hands and then gently spread the sunblock across Jenna’s upper back. It was just like applying an antifungal cream to a patient, I told myself.
It wasn’t anything like that. Jenna’s skin was soft under my fingertips, and the smell of the sunblock was delicious. With her hair nearly tickling my nose, I caught a new whiff of something herbal. I took a long, deep breath, transported to Bali or the Cook Islands, just me and Jenna hand in hand on the beach, surrounded by blooming plumeria or hibiscus. I imagined tucking a blossom behind Jenna’s ear and then bending down to kiss her gently.
Warning bells flashing in my mind, I blinked and noticed a smear of white a little higher than where I’d been touching. “There’s a little bit not rubbed in on your neck.” My voice was unsteady. “Do you want me to get that, too?”
“Yeah, go for it.” I thought maybe her voice was a little shaky, too, but it might have been my imagination.
I finished applying the lotion in smooth, steady strokes. “There.”
Jenna turned around. “Thanks.”
We stared at each other.
Jenna was beautiful and kind, and she appreciated Grandma. She was patient, and she laughed at my jokes. I opened my mouth to speak.
“Ready to go?” she asked, tone upbeat.
I let whatever moment we’d been having slip away. “Yeah.”
It didn’t matter. Jenna made it clear why she’d never date a coworker, even if she could get over the fact that I didn’t believe in love. And I was still rational enough to realize that what I was feeling was purely chemical, a function of evolution.
At least that’s what I kept reminding myself.
There was a short line ahead of us for the wave machine, mostly teenagers, and a few people my mom’s age. Jenna scrutinized the would-be surfers. Many of them couldn’t stand upright, getting swept back against the wall before they’d even made it onto the board. Others stood for only a few seconds before toppling over.
“Can’t lock your legs,” I muttered.
