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A pitiful, nausea-inducing sadness roils in my stomach. “You’re leaving?” I ask to be certain I heard him correctly.
“That is what I said.” Orcus turns to finish strapping on a rather impressive looking brown leather vest. The bond is riddled with guilt which only amplifies my nausea.
Growing up, I’d gotten used to being alone. Not that I enjoyed it. I remember sitting in my bedroom, watching the shadows pass over my wall and wondering if anyone would ever love me. Some afternoons I chose to stay locked away, hoping my parents might seek me out and ask what was wrong, but they never did. They left me. And now so is Orcus.
“But what am I supposed to do?” I step over one of the many weapons scattered across the floor, forcing him to acknowledge me.
“I don’t plan to be gone long. There is food to keep you fed until I return. You’ll be safe.”
So he expects me to sit around in the cave and wait around for him? I think not. “What if I leave?”
His hands fall away from the vest and he looms over me. “You’re staying.”
“You can’t be serious. You want me to stay in the cave for who knows how long? What about getting Prometheus home?”
The dragon huffs and growls at Orcus as if to say,yeah, what about me.
Dropping into a squat so we’re mostly at eye level, Orcus grabs the back of my neck and tugs me closer. “I thought I showed you why you need to stay.” His tusks brush over my cheeks as he presses his mouth to mine. “If I had time, I’d remind you of exactly how wonderfully you fall apart, but the vampires are restless.”
“Vampires?” I squeak. “Are you going to fight?”
“They’re threatening our borders.” He kisses me again and I find my lips parting of their own accord, submitting to the harsh demands of his tongue. “And,” he says as he breaks away, “While I generally refuse to be my father’s pawn, people are dying. I have to help. It’s safest for you here.” Determination slashes across his features.
“Why you?” I ask. “Doesn’t the king have an army?”
“He does, but I’m the best warrior.”
“Most humble as well,” I quip, tucking my hands behind my back to hide the trembling.
He narrows his eyes. “The sarcasm is back.”
“I’ll be fine.” I frown. “War is dangerous.”
He’s frustrating, but I don’t want him to get hurt. The bond practically whines at the thought of him bloodied and bruised.
“Not for me,” he says too quickly. “And it’s not war.”
“Liar, and what if it’s the start of one?”
“I’ll be back, little flower.”
“And if you don’t come back?” If something happens to him, I’ll be alone. I’ll lose the closest thing I’ve ever had to love. With the bond, he’s obligated to keep me alive. Other monsters might not feel the same. I could go to the magic village but that’s so far, and I’m not sure I’d survive the monster realm. The monsters kept their distance at the inn, but they were also terrified of Orcus. They won’t be scared of me.
He grips my chin, and I meet his gaze. “Trust that I will. I refuse to die before I see that smile one more time and fill that sweet cunt with my seed.”
Heat swoops low in my belly, and my core clenches around nothing. I should scold him or say something, but I’m stuck picturing Orcus falling apart as he comes inside of me. My thighs press together.
“Needy little human,” he teases and smashes his lips to mine in a rough kiss.
I don’t want it to end. I clutch his tusks and pour everything I have into the kiss, hoping he’ll understand why I want him here.
He releases me and I press my lips together, reluctantly releasing his tusks. He stands and slips the last of his weapons into their holsters. I want to ask to go with, but I’m not that dumb. A human has no place in a battle between ogres and vampires. I’d be a liability. If people are dying, I can’t ask him to stay. I’m not that selfish. Though, a little part of me wishes I were. I don’t want him to go. My heart is strangely heavy as he begins to leave. The bond screams at me to run after him.
He stops halfway down the tunnel, turning back to study me for a few moments. The bond has to be swimming in my despair. Maybe he’s changing his mind. Maybe he’ll take me with. Maybe he won’t leave me alone. Maybe… who am I kidding? He’s right. I have to stay and he has to go.
Obligation weighs heavily upon him, and the hard sigh he releases is full of emotion that can’t be put to words. Regret. Anger. Responsibility. Sadness. For a breath, he lets it all take over and I see how much this decision tears him apart, how much it weighs him down, but he’s too good to let monsters die when he could help.
He shouldn’t have to choose.
