Page 64 of Monster Mishap


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“Try something else,” Maddox suggests.

The trull snickers and shakes his head. “I’m going to find something to eat.”

“No murdering anyone,” I say.

“Calm yerself. I don’t plan on killin’ anyone. An arm or leg’ll do just fine.”

“Harald,” I warn.

“Yeah, yeah. I hear ya, Princess. I’ll behave. Swear it on my mum’s grave.”

I don’t know anything about trull culture or even if he has a mom he cares about enough to keep his promises. I squint at him and he glares right back.

“Trulls don’t swear on their parent’s graves unless they mean what they say,” Maddox says. “Besides, as murderous and deadly as he may be, even this little lad isn’t dumb enough to risk angering the king.”

“Call me a little lad again,” Harald dares.

Maddox’s eyes light with challenge, and he starts to say it again, but I quickly cut in with a harsh, “Enough.”

The fight flees both of their bodies.

“Sorry,” Maddox mumbles.

“I’m not,” Harald snaps. “I’ll skin him alive if he says it again. Ogre skin makes mighty fine clothes.”

Maddox scoffs. “You’vekilled an ogre?”

These two are going to drive me crazy. “Hey, both of you, shut up! I need to focus on waking up Orcus and I can’t do that with you two having a pissing contest!”

The trull blinks at me. “Who in their right mind would compete with piss?”

“Yeah, that’s gross,” Maddox adds.

I drop my head into my hands and groan. “Please, just go eat.”

“Well, all right, Princess. No need to get all grumpy about it,” Harald says with a huff, like I’m the one being the pain in the ass.

* * *

Dozens of attemptsand what feels like three hours later, I still haven’t been able to wake Orcus. Maddox has fallen asleep, knocked out by the meds the doctor gave him for his own broken ribs. Avery gave Harald one of the empty beds, and he’s happily counting the many skins from his cart, lovingly stroking them. I try not to pay attention to that. If I think about it for too long, I might throw up.

Prometheus is curled up between Orcus’ feet, having had a full meal of some meat Avery brought for it. My own meal sits untouched beside the bed. I drop my head onto Orcus’ chest in defeat. I’ve tried everything, but aside from his cock getting hard, he hasn’t so much as wiggled a toe.

“Perhaps you should rest,” Avery suggests. “You’ve been at it for a while and you’ve had a long journey. I’ve managed to keep the king at bay, but he won’t listen to me for much longer. I think you might like to sleep before you meet him.”

I swallow. What does the king want to meet me for? I’m nothing special. I’m his son’s mate, sure, but it’s not like I’m some Disney princess without a family…oh. Maybe I am more like a Disney princess than I thought.

Sitting up, I cover a yawn. “Can I stay with him?”

“Of course.” Avery places a hand on my shoulder. “I’ll get you a blanket.”

“No need. I can share with him.”

Their face softens in understanding. “All right, honey. The night nurse will be here soon. She’ll be in the office if you need anything, and I’ll be back in the morning.” Avery gives me a gentle squeeze before stepping away.

“Thanks, Avery.” I smile at the centaur, realizing that the monster didn’t even faze me. I’ve been in this world long enough to expect the strange and unusual. Nothing could be worse than the cyclops. I slip under the blankets, molding myself to Orcus’ side. I carefully set one leg over his much larger thigh but keep my arm off his torso. I’ve never had broken ribs, but according to Harald, they’re incredibly painful. I tuck one arm beneath my head and interlace my free hand with his.

“You have to wake up,” I tell him. “I didn’t sign up to be a widow.” He doesn’t answer. I didn’t expect him to. “I made friends with a trull. He’s nice, if not a little scary, but I think he means well. Apparently trulls are super stabby. I kind of think he’s cute,” I whisper the last part. “Reminds me of the troll dolls back home.”

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