Page 72 of Monster Mishap


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“I want to stay. Not that it matters, you’re ready to send me away.” If I pout, it’s merely a coincidence.

“It’s not safe. You saw my wounds. I’m an ogre. You’re so breakable.”

“Oh, so what? You’re deciding for me?”

“I wasn’t deciding for you. I was trying to keep you safe.”

I wish I could throw something at his big stubborn ogre head, but he’s too tall and my aim is terrible. “What if I want to stay regardless of the danger? Have you ever thought of that?”

“Why would you want to stay? This world, the monster territory especially, isn’t where you belong. Not to mention the anger of the furies. There’s a good chance you might die. I might die.”

“Like hell you will. If I’m not allowed to be here, then you’re not allowed to die.”

His lips twitch. “That’s not how it works.”

I nod. “Exactly. So it’s settled then.”

“What?” The way his face scrunches is honestly so cute.

“I’m staying.”

Those dark blue irises flash. “Little flower—”

“Don’tlittle flowerme when you’re trying to break up with me. I’m staying. If you want me to leave, you will have to physically remove me from this world yourself and seeing as I’m the only one with the activation word, you can’t. Sorry, grumpy, you’re stuck with me.”

“Zyla is still crafting her spell for me.”

“But it won’t be ready for weeks, right?”

He nods.

“Good. Then give me until then to prove that I can fit into your world. I might be human, but I’m chronically optimistic and my new bestie is a serial killer. He may be tiny, but he is mighty. I bet he’d give any vampire a run for his money.”

“That he would,” Orcus murmurs. He pulls away and starts to pace. “I told him I wanted the throne.”

“Yup, and I’ve always wanted to marry a prince.” I flop onto his bed and watch him spiral.

“My mother and sisters will be unbearable. They’ll demand to spend time with you. They’ll dress you up like a doll.” He pivots and walks in the other direction.

“I love dressing up,” I say, though I don’t really think he’s talking to me.

He pivots. “There’s no guarantee the fighting won’t escalate within a few weeks.”

“So let them come. Worst case, we both die. Or here’s a novel idea, why don’t you try talking to them?”

“The time for talking is done. My father should have confessed… he—”

“But you’re about to become king, yeah? Maybeyoushould do the things he was too cowardly to do.”

Orcus turns again, and I have to look away before I get nauseous. His gaze jumps to meet mine. “They wouldn’t listen to me.”

“Maybe they would if you told them what happened, apologized, and gave them something to make up for the mistake.”

Orcus hums. “My father.”

“What? No. I meant like cookies or your mom’s fair winning pie.”

“They’d just kill him,” Orcus says as if that’s any better.

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