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“Why are you lecturing me all of a sudden? It’s not like this is anything new.”
“I don’t ever want to hurt your feelings, Len.” Everleigh reaches across the table and squeezes my hand. “You’re free to do what you want, and I’ll always accept you. I’ve just been worried more lately, I guess. I don’t know. It’s probably those true crime shows I binge.”
“Those don’t help, but why show this concern to me now? You never did before.”
Everleigh sighs and wraps her hand around her mug. “It’s just Maia and I were talking and—”
I stop her. “Talking about me? Great.”
“Not like that, Len. All we did was talk about the same concern we have.”
“Spill it already, Ev.”
“It just seems like lately…I don’t know, it just seems like you bring home more guys than usual.”
I blow out a breath, and my shoulders slump, but I don’t say anything. I look away, unable to hold eye contact.
“If you’re okay, then we’re okay. But if there’s something you want to talk about, I’m here. Maia is too.”
“Thanks, but I’m fine really. Please don’t worry. I’m just having fun.”
“Okay, I trust you.” She takes a sip of her coffee. “So…that was nice of Holden to make sure you got home safe last night.”
“Yeah, I guess.”
“You guess? What’s going on between you two anyway?”
“Nothing. Why?”
“Sometimes you two seem a little more than friends.” Everleigh wiggles her eyebrows and grins.
“And when did you see this?”
“Oh, come on, girl, you ain’t fooling me. You two have flirted and danced the line between friends and a little more than friends since freshman year. Landon also told me he saw you two disappear together one night on the ski trip.”
Now it’s my turn to give her a questioning look. “Consider the source.”
“Okay, fine, but you have to admit I’m right.”
“Right about what?”
Everleigh laughs. “Wow, Len. Nice deflection.”
“Holden and I are just friends,” I say as I get up for a refill of coffee. “Sure, there’s harmless flirting, but who doesn’t?”
“Whatever you say. But I know feelings when I see them.”
“Cool,” I mutter, stirring cream and sugar into my freshly poured cup. I’m not giving her much, and it’s driving her crazy, but there’s nothing really to say. Holden and I agreed never to talk about the sex and move on. So I haven’t told anyone. It’s hard not to say anything, the words ready to spill out. I don’t want to break Holden’s trust or make things weird with our friends, so it’s better this way. But at the same time, I’m filled with guilt at the thought of leaving my best friend in the dark. “He really is just a nice guy.”
She studies me as I sit back down at the table across from her. “That he is. So what’ve you got to lose?”
“Our friendship. I like how things are. Why change it?”
“Because he could be the love of your life standing right in front of you!” Everleigh says, her voice raised an octave higher than before. She’s a hopeless romantic who can’t help rooting for love in every situation. It’s cute, but it’s not practical. She has to realize it won’t always work out like what movies make you believe. That’s not real life. A lot of what comes to be in our lives is a direct result from our choices and actions. And sometimes that doesn’t always include love.
“But maybe I’m not ready for something like that. If it’s meant to be, it’ll happen, right?”
Everleigh shrugs. “Yeah, maybe, if you’re lucky. But I am glad you have a friend like Holden. I know he’ll take care of you when I can’t.”
