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Her shock turned to righteous indignation. “Howdareyou ask me that question. I’ve made it very clear, Sadie Turner, that I don’t ever want to discuss that with you.”
“Unless you’re the one bringing it up.”
“I beg your pardon.”
I rolled my right shoulder, trying to ease the tight muscles in my neck. While it was nice that Bella had allowed me to sleep on her couch last night, it hadn’t been great on my body. I missed my pillowy bed and those ridiculous Egyptian cotton sheets with the high thread count.
Andres had really spoiled me in so many ways.
An abrupt ice pick headache stabbed my forehead and I waited until it passed to respond to my mother. “For the past…” I quietly counted on my fingers and then gave up. “Since I was a kid, you’ve been leaning on me too much to help you with your husband.”
“That’s not true.”
“That’s another thing you do. You try to tell me what’s true and not true.”
She pointedly lifted her lemonade. “Well, you’ve always had so much trouble telling the difference between fantasy and reality. Remember all those nightmares you had as a kid? It was hard to believe anything you said.”
“I’m a grown adult. I have a job, a car, a place to live—” Pain shot through my core, but I ignored it so I could keep my mother in check. “So what if I had nightmares as a kid? That doesn’t mean my feelings aren’t real.”
She stared at me for a moment like she was trying to figure out how to best manipulate what I said.
But I didn’t give her time to think of anything. “You and Dad have used me as a messenger during your silent wars. You’ve leaned on me for emotional support when you couldn’t handle the stress of your marriage. You’ve applied so much pressure to me that I see stars every time I encounter pressure in the real world.”
“I’m sorry you feel that way.”
“You should be sorry, Mom. It’s your fault.”
Her silence was tepid at best. Even with the way my cheeks were heating up, I knew better than to stop. This was years in the making. And the only reason I felt brave enough to say a word to her today was because of Bella.
In lots of ways, it was because of Andres too.
“You have no sense of boundaries or personal space,” I proceeded. “You’re constantly sending me messages and calling me. I have my own life, Mom. I have people I care about. I have goals.”
She chuckled with enough condescension to make my entire body go rigid with agitation. “Sadie, you don’t have goals. You spend all your time at home.”
“I did that because you forced me to stay home.”
“You could have left at any time. I don’t see why you’re bringing this to me now. I don’t remember any of those things.”
I shook my finger at her. “These aremyfeelings. You don’t get to say what they are or what they mean to you. Your job is to listen. You’re my mother. Or did you forget that in the time it took for you to decide that you didn’t care about me?”
She pouted. “Sadie, how can you say such a thing? Of course, I care about you.”
“You don’t really act like it. You never ask me how I’m doing. Every time you contact me, it’s about how Dad is doing something you don’t like or how I’m supposed to distract the family from your embarrassment.”
Her mouth dropped open to speak but again, I didn’t let her get anything out.
“No, you don’t get to deny that. I’m not letting that happen. You’ve been walking all over me for years.” I glared at the food left on my plate. “Dad has been doing it too. Feel free to share that information with him.”
She slammed her mouth shut.
Good. I was getting through to her a bit.
“Listen, I hate that I’m doing this. I don’t want to fight with you. I don’t want my relationships to become like—”
I choked on a sob. It took a few deep breaths to get rid of it, but by goddess, I was going to make my feelings heard. No more swallowing uncomfortable things. No more bending myself backwards just to help my mother and father.
It was my time now. “All I ever saw in my life was you and Dad fighting. Do you know what that does to a kid?”
