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“Good night, angel.” I whisper. “How do you like your collar?”
“Mmm.” His sleepy mind ponders on the question. “It feels good.”
It feels good.
Who could ask for a better response than that.
thirty-one
Porter
Atsomepointinthe night, I wake up. I have no idea what the time is, and no chance of going back to sleep. My mind won't let me. The memory of last night runs through my head. I begged this man not to untie me, because if I'm untied, I have to fight and I really don't want to fight this. I can't fight this.
A naked man is lying beside me, and I can't do anything about it. I am stuck here in his bed, used for his pleasure, and I shouldn't be. I should be creeping over to the door or wrapping my hands around his throat. Instead, I'm lying here.
I could say it's the fact my cock is hanging out of the tiny shorts, or the size of the plug he shoved inside me. I could blame the collar or the wrist restraints pinning my hands together. Whatever it is, it's keeping me tucked up under these covers, lying with this man.
My mind even goes as far as to think he's been kind to me. Yes, he kidnapped me, removed my clothes, tied me up and fucked me, but he is a criminal. He did criminal things, nicely.
I am so fucked up.
I should test the water by taking a trip to the bathroom and see if he notices. But I still don't move. What the fuck is keeping me here? It can't be because I want this. I can't stay here because I need his touch. It can't be.
“Relax. Go back to sleep.” Knox's hand ghosts across my abdomen.
Instantly, all my pent up need to move catches up with me at once and I leap from the bed.
“What are you doing?” Knox's voice calls from where he still lies in bed.
“I'm sorry. I don't know what I'm doing. I'm trying to be good, but I don't understand this.” Why am I defending my actions to him? He did this to me.
“I understand.”
“No, you don't. How could you understand what this is like for me?”
I thought being exposed in these tiny shorts made me vulnerable, but Knox confidently climbs from the bed completely naked and starts a slow walk towards me.
“Please don't,” I breathe heavily. This isn't fair. He makes me powerless when he gets close.
“Just breathe.” His body presses up against mine. My hands raise between us as a barrier but end up trapped. “I understand you need time. You aren't going to be the perfect pet right away. There will be moments like this, and I won't blame you. I won't get angry.”
“What if I don't want this?”
“But we both know you do.” He lifts my head, pressing his lips to mine in a way that makes me forget all my protests.
“This is so unfair.”
“Yeah, but you just love melting into a big strong guy who can look after you.” Knox looks down at me with nothing but devotion. “You don't need to be swinging from the rafters to prove to yourself that you're trapped here.”
“I do though. Why can’t you understand that? I don't do this kind of thing. I don't just sleep around for the hell of it. I don’t sell myself.” I drop my head as tears start to fall.
“How about you come back to bed and cuddle.” His hands reach down to the clip pinning my wrists. “You weren't ready for this off last night. Are you ready now?”
How dare he make this my fault. And yet, I remember begging him. My head nods, I'm so pathetic.
“Good boy.” He releases the clip and allows my hands to part. “Now tell me what you want?”
“I want…” What do I want? I want to keep Mum in rehab. I want to keep my sister safe. But what do I want for myself?
