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His words are loud, and aimed at the stairs, clearly meant for me. But they aren't much help guiding my purpose, so I'll have to improvise. The bedroom is empty, but there is a mobile phone and a gun on the bedside table. They'll come in handy, but the closer I get, the louder the sounds from the bathroom become. The sound of running water. The terrifying sound I endured on and off for three days. It shouldn't have this effect on me, but my heart is racing.
I know I was suspended in the bathtub, and throughout my days of captivity, the men made use of the bathroom facilities. I heard them peeing, brushing their teeth and even showering.
Now the sound of a shower has me rooted to the spot, bracing for the beating I came to expect afterward.
I'm less than a metre from the weapon on the side, but my legs won't move. My hand reaches forward, but the bandages tighten around me. I can’t move. I can’t breathe. I'm as icy cold now as I was in the bathroom.
This is not the time or the place for these fears. Knox would tell me to pull myself together. Gavriil would threaten to tear me a new one. I never did find out what new one I would get. Porter would huddle in the corner with me and rub my back. He would tell me that this is OK and real men like us can cry if we want to.
Real men.
I'm about as real as that lamp next to the gun I want so desperately. A lamp that is very real, so my stupid thoughts are more broken than I am. Knox shouldn't have brought me with him. He should have brought someone reliable, like Caeo.
Backing away from the bed, I do the one part of Knox's orders I can follow, and call Caeo.
"Knox, where the bloody hell are you?" Caeo yells instantly, and I almost drop the phone.
"I'm helping him," I sob, I can’t hold it back anymore. "There is a gun here, but I can't get it. The shower… He's in the shower and I can't get the gun."
"OK, Nico. Let's focus on what's important. You need to breathe. Now, where are you and whatheare you talking about?"
"I'm in upstairs of Carter Turnbridge house. Knox is downstairs. I am in room but the shower…"
"Is there anywhere you can hide?"
"I am not hiding. Mr Slayer is downstairs with Mr Turnbridge. He asked me to follow him, and I got inside but I don't know what he wants me to do now."
"So, you want the gun to help?"
"I can capture maybe the man in the shower and bribe out a way for Mr Slayer."
"OK. You're muddling words. I will help you and talk you through everything."
"Thank you, Mr Caeo."
"Knowing when you need help is a very strong and brave thing."
I give something of a grunt as my reply. Freezing up at the sound of a tap isn't a brave thing to do.
"I'm going to hum down the phone," Caeo declares, seeming quite proud of the idea. "You are going to listen to that, and only that. You are going to get the gun and you are going to keep yourself safe until I get there. Do you understand?"
"Yes, Sir."
Caeo starts humming, but I don’t recognise the tune, which is a good thing as it keeps me focused on the humming and not the other sounds.
I've pocketed the phone and grabbed the gun before I realise why. The shower has stopped, there's as much humming from the bathroom as there is from Caeo.
"What I do? What I do?"
"Deep breaths. Then take that mother fucker down. We might need leverage."
"That mean like hostage?" English is so much harder when my mind is panicking.
"It does indeed."
Right. Disable, don't kill. I can do this.
The man walks out of the bathroom with a blue towel around his middle, his hands rubbing a second through his dark hair. His eyes open and focus on me.
