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He offers me a seat at the table as he rescues the kettle off the Aga. “Decaf—and before you accuse me of making assumptions, this is me erring on the side of caution so you can tell me what you need to tell me in your own time.”
“Ailsa mentioned she wouldn’t mind a cup if there were one going. Just milk.”
“She gets decaf, too,” he says with a big grin. “You stay put, I’ll take it out to her.”
He places our two cups on the table before taking the third one out to Ailsa. I study the kitchen while he’s gone. The table is big enough to play a game of ping pong on if one were so inclined. The Welsh dresser is adorned with the most adorably mismatched china, and the walls and fridge are covered in Pippa’s artwork—mostly horses. Proud daddy. And for some reason that puts me entirely at peace with my decision.
As I hear him walking down the hall, I take a deep breath and let it out slowly.
This is it.
He smiles at me as he comes back in. “Do you want me next to you, or across from you?” he asks.
“Next to me.” I don’t know if I can look at him and say what I need to say.
I take a long sip of my decaffeinated tea. “The only thing I know for sure is that I’m going to keep it. You needed to be the first to know. And I suppose there are other decisions that should be made jointly. But I just wanted you to know, and felt you deserved to be told in person.”
“Oh, Alex, I can’t tell you how happy I am to hear you say this. I’d hoped this was what you wanted, but I really meant it when I said that I’d support you, whatever your decision. And yes, there are a great many decisions to be made, but we don’t have to make any of them right now.”
“Well, I think there are probably some we need to make right now, because it’s best we get ahead of this before there’s any risk of it being leaked. Because the tabloids would be all over it.”
“If you really wanted to get right out in front of it, we could get married, but—no hear me out—I know that’s not what you want. But realistically, it’s the direction I see us already heading. And having a baby on the way just moves up the timeline.”
“What about Pippa? Jumping into marriage just because there’s a baby on the way is not going to be best for her—or the new baby.”
“I didn’t say we should jump into marriage because there’s a baby on the way. We’ll do everything we can to make sure Pippa knows and feels she’s loved. She’ll be fine.”
“You’ve thought about this haven’t you?” I ask, stealing a glance at him.
He blushes slightly. “Guilty as charged. I’ve been through every possible scenario, and there is only one other that makes sense to me.”
“And that is?”
“You move in. We tell everyone the truth—that we’ve been seeing each other secretly since your brother’s wedding.”
“How would that be any different from getting married?”
“Well what would you suggest?”
“Get right out in front of it. We’ve been seeing each other. We made a baby. We’ll co-parent and see where things go from there.”
“I don’t like how this leaves you publicly vulnerable.”
“We’ll make it work. And in the spirit of getting out in front, I’m going to need to tell my parents tonight.”
“I think that’swe’regoing to tell your parents.”
“Freddy—”
“No, this is not optional. I’ll make arrangements for Pippa this evening. After we’ve told your parents, I will tell Pippa.”
I want to argue, but he’s right. “Okay. If you can be at my place for six-thirty, we can go talk to my parents around seven.”
20
Alfred
As soon as Alex leaves,I call Jenny’s mum and arrange for her to take care of Pippa. Good Christ, I’m racking up an awful lot of childcare IOUs.
