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He turns to look at me. “We talked about it after sophomore year too and junior year.”
“Okay, well again, things change.” I cross my arms. “Camille is tired and she and Shawn want to travel and she’s been handling a lot herself for years. The café is going to be Avery’s at some point, so she wants to get involved now. Don’t tell me you’re giving her a hard time.” I’m at war with myself because I would be saying this if it were about anyone, but I’ll admit the fact that it’s about Avery has me feeling a bit more aggressive about it.But really, he’s holding her to a promise they made at eighteen after graduation and too many shots of tequila?
“I haven’t said anything to her, Dad.” His eyes shoot to mine and I can see they’re filled with annoyance. “I’m talking toyouabout it. Excuse me for being disappointed that she’s not moving to New York like I thought. Rory is bummed too for the record.”
“Rory is moving there?” I ask because I hadn’t been aware that it had been a group decision.
“Yeah, but she wants to work in fashion, so New York was the obvious next step.”
I contemplate my next question, wondering if I want to live under the veil of ignorance regarding his feelings for Avery to help ease my guilt.
Fuck it.“Son—”
Careful.My subconscious warns.Once he says it, you can’t unhear it.
“I don’t want to hear it about Avery,” he interrupts. “We’re friends, that’s it.” He stands up and the fact that he’s trying to shut down this conversation by leaving the room speaks volumes.Avoidance.
“You’re okay with that?” I ask as I follow him towards the kitchen.
He tosses his beer bottle in the recycling bin. “I made peace with it a long time ago.”
“So you’ve said, but you don’t act like it.”
He leans against the counter with his arms crossed defensively. “How should I act? She’s my best friend.”
“I just mean…you don’t treat her like she’s your best friend. You treat her like your girlfriend. You always have.”
“Dammit.” He sighs. “You don’t get it, Dad. That’s just how we are.”
The denial is so loud, but for my own selfish reasons, I don’t push it. Maybe he really is just trying to get over her and being in different cities will definitely help. He’ll meet someone in New York and forget about Avery.
Distance can absolutely make the heart grow yondernotfonder, after all.
I try to ignore my conscience arguing with the rationalizations I’m making because regardless of his feelings for her, sleeping with your son’s best friend is definitely a terrible fucking idea.
Over the next few days, I spend more time with Lucas and see little of Avery unless she’s with him. I haven’t so much as touched her since that night in my car on Sunday and I feel like I’m fucking losing it. We have exchanged a few sexy texts back and forth but we haven’t even FaceTimed or talked on the phone because the timing just hasn’t lined up to allow us to do either.
I’m sitting on my patio, having some coffee and going through emails, enjoying a quiet morning while Lucas is at the gym. I took a few days off from work to spend time with him before he moved to New York and for the most part, I haven’t been needed at work.
I lean back in my chair and stare into the massive pool that sits behind my house just as I hear my front door close and, “Dad?” being called through the house.
My head snaps towards the source of the sound just in time to see Raegan sliding the screen door open and stepping outside. Her dark hair is pulled into a sleek bun behind her head and she’s wearing what looks like a men’s t-shirt as a dress and sneakers, which surprises me because I don’t think I’ve ever seen her not in some sort of heel unless she’s going to the gym. For a moment, I’m rendered speechless at how much she looks like her mother. I stand and hold my hands out to her.
“Rae.” She rushes into my arms like she’s been wanting to do it for days.
“I’m sorry, I snapped at you on the phone!” She cries into my shirt and I press my lips to her forehead, holding her tighter.
“Why are you crying? Water under the bridge. What’s going on, huh? Here, sit down.” I pull a chair out for her and she sits diagonal from me. “Are you hungry? Want something to drink?”
“No.” She shakes her head and puts her bag on the table, aLouis Vuittontote I bought her for her birthday a few years ago that shehadto have or she’d die.Her words.
She pulls a bottle of water out of her bag and takes a long sip. “Dad.” She scrunches her nose and I notice that all of her freckles are out which means she’s been out in the sun lately. “Lucas isn’t here, is he?”
“No, he’s at the gym. Just us here.”
“Good, he’ll just…” She shakes her head. “Dad, I want you to know that first and foremost, I’m excited. I…I know you’re not going to be at first, but I think once you get to know Wes and realize this is for real, you’ll breathe easier.”
Anxiety bubbles inside of me.She got married or she’s pregnant. Fuck. Fuck. FUCK.
