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“That’s the reason I want you to stay. You understand that after my accident, I’m a square peg and will never fit in a round hole. I need that in my life. If I’m honest, even my mom never accepted me completely after the accident.”
I tipped my head in confusion. “Lance, she was your biggest fan.”
He took my hand and held it, squeezing it a few times before he answered. “She was, don’t get me wrong, she was a wonderful mother. It was just quite often she wanted me to be something I could never be. I never held it against her, because I understood that she was just worried about my future, but I’d have to remind her that I was an adult and I had to make my own choices.”
I squeezed his hand back. I was happy he was holding it and I didn’t want to let go. “I see what you mean. She spent a lot of years being your biggest advocate and I bet it was hard for her to take a step back. I’ll stay for the holidays, Lance. You don’t have to worry about it.”
“I wouldn’t make you stay, of course,” he said quickly. “You know if an apartment opened up in town that you could leave at any time, right?”
“Of course, but none will. Nothing will be available now until the new housing opens in January. If those apartments are already rented, it will be spring.”
“You certainly know Bells Pass. That’s why I always lived at home. There wasn’t much sense in trying to move out when there was no place to go.”
“And why would you? Your mom’s chocolate cake was enough reason to stay,” I said, hip checking him.
“She did make the best cake, that’s for sure. Well, anyway, forget what I said about you having to stay. I wasn’t thinking right. I’ll have you for however long you want to stay.”
My heart melted. He was desperately trying to explain some feeling that he couldn’t put into words. “I’m going to stay through the holidays, Lance. I’m not going to leave you there alone to work through everything stuck inside your chest. A friend doesn’t do that to a friend. That said, I’d like to apologize for stealing your pencils in school. A friend doesn’t do that either.”
His laughter filled the gazebo and it lightened the heaviness in my chest to hear it. “Thanks for the apology. I always wondered why you did that. It made me mad, and Mrs. Larson always got so aggravated with the two of us.”
“In hindsight, I suppose it was one of those cases where a girl had a crush on a boy and wanted his attention. We were only eleven, after all.”
His brow lowered to his nose. “Wait, you had a crush on me in fifth grade?”
It was my laughter that filled the space this time. “Lance, I had a crush on you since kindergarten. I know we were just supposed to be friends, but I liked how honest you were with me about everything. At least until sixth grade.”
He gave me one quick nod and then sighed. “A lot has changed in sixteen years.”
“One thing hasn’t. I still want to be your friend, so as long as you’ll have me as one, we can start there.”
“I would love to start on a clean slate other than the good memories we made together. Maybe we can figure everything else out as we go?”
“I’d like that,” I agreed in a soft whisper. “A lot. I’ve missed having you as a friend. Staying at your house the last week has made me the happiest I’ve been in a whole lot of years.”
“Same, Indigo Dickson, same,” he whispered, the night nearly stealing his words. “You know what else makes me happy?” I shook my head rather than answer. “Your hugs. Do you have one to spare?”
I turned into him and wrapped my arms around his waist. “You can have them all, Lance Garland.”
When his arms tightened around me a little bit more, my heart told me exactly what we needed to figure out as we went along.
Chapter Five
The diner was quiet, but it was only four a.m., and since the baking was no longer done here, the silence was to be expected. It was also welcome. I loved nothing more than a solid meeting of the minds with no distractions. That’s why we were at the diner and not the bakery.
“I’m here, Ivy,” I called out, hanging my coat on the coat rack. A smile filled my face to think in another few weeks the coat rack would be replaced by the annual Nightingale Diner Mitten and Hat Christmas tree. The diner collected winter gear for the kids, and Ivy used the scarves as garland and the mittens as ornaments. If you brought in gear, you got free pie. It was a win-win for everyone.
Garland.
I immediately thought of those shining brown eyes from last night. They were filled with hurt and pride in a way I’d never seen before. They held grief but also hope and I didn’t know where he found the strength to get up every morning and keep going. Then again, Lance was always the most positive person I’d ever known, even more so after the accident, so maybe that was why. All I knew was, when I was with him, I felt differently about life. I forgot about the heavy stuff and focused on the bright sides of my life. The bakery and Lance. It might not seem like a lot to some people, but for me, it was everything.
“Morning, Indigo,” Ivy said, rousing me from my thoughts.
“Hey, Ivy,” I said, giving her a hug. “How’s it going this morning?”
Before she could answer, Becca walked through the door, a smile on her face. “Good morning, gal pals,” she said, hanging up her coat. “How’s the morning?” She gave pause when she saw Ivy’s face. “You don’t look so hot. No offense.”
Ivy waved her hand. “None taken. It was a long night. I haven’t slept yet and the sun is almost up.”
