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I screamed in frustration. I would have to clean it up quickly before anyone could see. I was down on my hands and knees, picking up flower petals when Nate opened his door. I looked up, unable to contain my alarm. He read my face and crouched beside me, concerned.
“What happened?”
“These are from Marcus,” I said. Even the words sounded like a betrayal. I had such a nice time with Nate the previous night and it seemed like Marcus just wanted to ruin that. Maybe he had. Maybe that was the point of the flowers. But if that was the case, it was even worse than I suspected. That would mean that Marcus knew all about Nate, and that was a level of intrusion that I didn’t want to contemplate.
“I’ll get someone to clean it up,” Nate said, helping me to my feet.
“He knows where I work,” I told my boss. I wanted to explain the rationale behind breaking the vase. It wasn’t just unwanted roses; it was the implicit knowledge that came with his gift. He wanted to tell me that he knew where I worked. That was terrifying and so much worse than any insult or injury.
“I’ll let security know,” Nate assured me.
“How did he find out?” I wondered out loud. It wouldn’t help me to have security on the lookout if Marcus was stalking me from across the street. I wondered if he was tracking my car, or if he had talked to any of my friends. Not knowing where he got his information made it difficult to remain calm.
Nate read it all and took me by the hand, pulling me close. “You’re safe.”
“I don’t feel safe,” I mumbled.
“Try not to think about it,” he said.
The shock threw me off balance and I had a hard time recovering enough to focus on my work. Nate had someone come by to clean up the mess. I sat at my desk, watching him mop. I tried not to make eye contact, but I couldn’t help watching.
The janitor scraped the remaining stems into the trash and swept the broken glass into a dustpan. He toweled the floor off and then wiped it clean, emptying my trash can into a larger one on wheels.
When he left, there was very little evidence. A small part of the floor was wet, but that dried soon enough. I knew that the janitor was wondering what had happened. If he thought that Nate and I had been in a fight or that someone had thrown the vase, he didn’t say. I wasn’t going to tell my whole sordid story anyway, so it didn’t really matter. I hoped it wouldn’t get back to me in the form of gossip. I had more important things to worry about at the moment.
I couldn’t keep my eyes off the window. Every time a car drove past, I jumped. We were on the fifth floor, so there wasn’t a lot of noise that reached us. But there was some and it was too much.
Nate found me staring at the computer screen, my eyes full of unshed tears. It was nearing lunch time and I knew he had an appointment soon. I had to get myself together if I was going to welcome his guests.
He took one look at me and sighed. “You should go home.”
“I’m fine,” I said stubbornly, wiping my eyes.
Any makeup I put on that morning was probably smudged by then. I couldn’t see myself but I knew that he could. He was being patient, but also needed a functioning secretary. I was less professional than I should have been and it was all Marcus’s fault.
“Ava, I’ll be fine,” Nate soothed, helping me to my feet. “I’ll get Peter’s secretary to sit here.”
I didn’t want to be replaceable. I wanted to do my job and be good at it. That was the high horse I was riding on when Marcus kicked me off. I didn’t have a choice though. I wasn’t competent to remain in the office. I would have to go back home and shake it off. Maybe I could do some boxing, or some other cardio that would help relieve the nervous tension.
I was just afraid that once I stepped foot outside the building, Marcus would swoop in. Not knowing where he was or how he got his intel was torture. I consoled myself with the knowledge that the place I was staying was built to shield women from jealous lovers. There was an entire nonprofit helping me hide from him, even though I had been unaware at the beginning that I needed to keep my location secret.
Nodding, I inhaled bravely, determined to retain as much of my dignity as possible. At least it was only Nate seeing me this way. If it was the rest of the office, if I had to work in a cubicle among the finance department or the salespeople, I would have been mortified. Whatever sick and twisted game Marcus was playing, he had the upper hand. I needed to gather my resources, maybe reach out to Mariah to let her know what was happening.
That was the best plan I had come up with so far. Of course, Mariah would know what to do. She helped dozens, maybe even hundreds, of women get out from under abusive boyfriends. She would know how to help me.
“Okay,” I answered Nate. “I’ll go. Thank you.”
“Take the day, and if you still feel bad tomorrow, give me a call.”
“I might call your mother,” I told him. I didn’t want Mariah to drop a bomb on him, telling him about our conversation before I could.
“That’s a good idea,” he approved.
I gathered up my purse and straightened my spine. I would hold my head up high as I walked through the lobby. Nate had security meet me at the front desk. I was about to walk past and go straight to my car when our day guard, Paul, caught up with me.
“Ma’am,” he said politely.
“Hello.”
