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Then, she grabs my elbow and drags me across the floor and down the hall to the library. This is where I usually like hiding during things like this, but immediately, I want to go back out on the floor.
“What is going on with you?”
“You were bothering me.”
She cocks her head and studies me. Ugh, she knows me too well.
“I don’t fall in love. It’s a silly, messy emotion.”
She studies me for a long moment, then straightens. “Jon, don’t go by your father’s behavior. Love is not silly.”
“It’s messy. And useless.”
“It is messy, but that’s part of the great thing about it.”
“And you? You’re happy with Travis now, but I remember the years of you being all goo-goo-eyed about him. And unhappy. You were miserable.”
“Yeah, well, we both had our heads up our butts.”
That makes me laugh, and her expression softens.
“But I wouldn’t give any of that up because of the end result.”
“You didn’t know you would end up together.”
“It’s the hope.”
“Hoping for things that never happen is not my usual go-to.”
She sighs. “Yeah. Our family is fucked up. But I promise you it’s worth it. Now tell me about Avery.”
“What’s there to tell? We’re opposites.”
“In a way. But not completely.”
“What’s that supposed to mean? I’m nothing like Avery O’Bryan.”
She snorts. “Oh, sweet, silly man, you two are so alike in important ways.”
“Oh, idiot woman, tell me what you’re talking about, or I’m out of here.”
She shakes her head. “First, you graduated from high school around the same age. You’re both brilliant. You’re both loners.”
“Avery is constantly surrounded by people.”
“True. But she’s…it’s hard to put it into words. She seems like such a solitary soul. She’s got this big family, but none of them know what she’s up to. Well, other than their grandmother. Liv’s been trying to fill those shoes, I think. It’s not easy, though, with everything she’s got going on.”
That makes me swallow a lump in my throat. I remember our night together on the couch, how she seemed out of it, and how she watched old shows her grandmother loved.
“She’s definitely working through some things.”
“And you are both Taylor Swift fans.”
“Come on, half the world loves Taylor Swift.”
“Okay, I’ll give you that one. But…just don’t let your father fuck you up. You would make a great husband and father, Jon. You’re solid; when you love someone, you go all out.”
I have to swallow another lump in my throat. We might be close, or at least close for the Howards. But we don’t talk like this.
