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“You’re beautiful.” My eyes connect with hers and hold. She blushes and then looks out across the water as a comfortable silence falls between us.
Pulling around the last curve of the lake, I paddle to the edge so we don’t get pushed back by the runoff.
“Look, do you see it?” I point off to the right.
“I do.”
Tucked in and barely noticeable to the average passing person is a small rocky river, and about a quarter of a mile down, there is a waterfall. The water from the river feeds into the lake, so between the current and the rocks, it’s a little more challenging than flatwater paddling.
“Do you ever go down there?” she asks.
I look down the river and notice the fog has lifted in a way that canopies over the top of the trees. Memories of Clay and I flash before my eyes.
Right after we were hired to be the summer band at Smokey’s, we found a small house for rent just outside the edge of town. We were young, naïve in so many ways, and so excited to be following our dreams. We kayaked the lake, found this river, and spent hours talking about how life was going to be once we made it big. It’s on those rocks down by the falls, five years later, we agreed to change the name of our band and move to Nashville.
“Yeah, in the summer, Clay and I kayak down and go swimming.” To my knowledge, he’s never brought anyone, and Ava’s a first for me. It’s one of those places you just don’t share with everyone.
“It’s so pretty. I wish I had a camera. Are there any trails leading down to it?” She leans to the side of the canoe, hoping for a better view, and I counterbalance her weight.
“Not that we’ve seen, so unless you travel up the river, you aren’t getting any closer. It’s pretty secluded.”
“Maybe next summer we can go.” She looks back to me.
My eyes dart to hers. It’s the first time she’s really mentioned anything about us and the future. My heart swells with hope.
“I’d love to take you down there. It’s a great place to swim if you can handle the cold water.” Thoughts of skinny dipping with her come to mind, but I keep that to myself.
“I’ll manage,” she smiles.
“Good. It’s a date,” I declare.
“Pretty sure of yourself, huh?” Her eyes light up.
I smile back. “When it comes to you, I’m very sure. You may be leaving today, but this,” my finger moves back and forth between the two of us, “isn’t over. It’s just beginning.”
DRIVING TO THE airport, both of us sit in complete silence. With each mile that passes, I feel the distance between us growing even more, and I hate it.
I don't want to say goodbye to him, but what would be the point in saying otherwise? I know he wants to see me again, but I fear if I do, I’ll lose myself to him completely, and I’m not sure if I’m ready for the repercussions if it were to end badly, because that’s what it would be for me . . . bad.
Sensing the tension growing between us, he reaches over and lays his hand on top of mine. My fingers were tapping on my leg and I didn’t even know it. Flipping my hand over, he laces his fingers through mine and brings it up to his lips for a kiss.
I watch as his kiss sears and brands the back of my hand.
Ash completely surprised me this morning by offering to take me on the lake. He didn’t have to do that—he could have gone off on his own, but he didn’t. He wanted me to see why he loves it here so much, and in return, it made me fall for him even more.
Most summers, the girls and I rent a boat and go tubing on the lake. We pack a lunch, speed around, and laugh at each other as we fly off the tube. But I can honestly say, not once have I truly taken in the view around me. Maybe because it was morning and it was calm, or maybe because it’s fall and the colors are so vibrant, or maybe it’s because I was with him, but I felt like I was seeing the lake, the valley, and the mountains for the first time. And I loved it.
I’d be lying if I said Ash and the lake didn’t steal a piece of my heart today, because they did; and when he asked me who I was, I really did want to answer him, and I hope one day he’ll understand why I didn’t. Despite my broken wrist and his mysterious call last night, this was the best weekend I’ve had in a really long time. I know it’s selfish, but I wasn’t ready to give that up by having to explain all the details of my life. It would have changed things, without a doubt.
“Ava,” his voice pulls me from the lake and back to the truck. As if reading my mind he says, “Thank you for the best birthday weekend I've ever had.”
I sigh contentedly and squeeze his fingers between mine. “I’m not sure what I did, other than cause you trouble, but you’re welcome.”
“You’d be surprised actually. You were exactly what I needed.” He looks away from me and out the front windshield of the truck, his thumb rubbing the back of my hand.
I want to ask him what he means, but there’s that gray area again where we really don’t talk about life and reality.
“Well, I’m glad I was able to do something for you, other than eat all your food and spend your money.” I try to lighten the mood, but his eyes are troubled when he looks back at me.
