AllFreeNovel
Share Us
Tae Hyun quietly snorted. “You’re a hundred times better than you think you are.”
“And you’re a hundred times better than me.”
Tae Hyun grabbed onto Jason’s forearms and gave them a little squeeze. “I love you, hyung.”
“I love you, too.”
The pair sat in silence for a few moments and held one another as Jason mentally tried to soak up as much of Tae Hyun’s pain as he could. Strangely, he thought of Joo Won’s broken mother haunting the ossuary where she’d interred her son’s ashes, waiting for someone to come along and release her from the pain. He’d tried to do that for her even if she didn’t deserve it. But he’d secretly suspected that it’s what Joo Won would’ve wanted him to do. He couldn’t say why. One of the things he’d realized over the years was just how little he’d really known about the boy. Maybe it was just his own conscience telling him it was the right thing to do in a language he’d understand. But if he could do that for her, he could certainly do it for the man he loved.
“Hyung?”
“Yeah? What’s up?”
“I think I want to go home.”
They were already home, in a sense. “Home?”
“To Los Angeles. I think I’m done with Seoul for a little while.”
Jason nodded and pressed his chin into Tae Hyun’s shoulder. He would march to the gates of hell for Tae Hyun. He could certainly take him to LA. “Okay. Let’s go home.”
25
Tae Hyun’s mood dramatically improved after Jason convinced him to eat something. Then, he explained the concept of an emotional hangover while they ate.
“You know how, say, you feel after a really great performance?”
Tae Hyun nodded instead of responding since his mouth was full of food. But he knew the sort of endorphin high he often experienced after a show that Jason referred to.
“Well, think of how you’re feeling now as the opposite of that. You went through a lot, which takes an emotional toll. Plus, there’s the effort to–I don’t know. Keep it together? You basically borrowed against future emotional energy to do all that, and today, you’re paying the price.”
Tae Hyun nodded again. “Yeah. This is what it felt like after we fought in Thailand. Or when I caught Chang Min cheating.” He quietly huffed. It was probably closer to the cheating thing. Tae Hyun had never experienced feeling that much raw emotion before. After his meltdown, he’d locked himself in his hotel suite’s bathroom and refused to speak to anyone, even after Oh Min Su convinced the hotel staff to unlock the door. Min Su, who’d been hiding his own gay secret and certainly must’ve suspected, if not known, about Tae Hyun and Chang Min. Min Su, who’d conspired with his lover Jeon I Jun to kidnap Tae Hyun. Min Su, who’d–No. He shook his head to clear it of those dark thoughts. “Except a million times worse.”
“But you feel better now?” Tae Hyun nodded. “Good. Take it easy on yourself anyway. You’ll bounce back, but it might take some time.”
“I know.” Tae Hyun looked down at the reheated leftovers and forced another bite. He wasn’t exactly hungry, and the food tasted oddly bland. But he knew his body needed the energy, so he ate it anyway. “Are you sure you’re okay going back to Los Angeles?”
Jason snorted. “Absolutely. I mean, don’t get me wrong. This trip hasn’t been all bad, right? We signed that new venue for your Seoul tour dates. And we finally muzzled KBR. At least, for now.”
Tae Hyun couldn’t help frowning. “Do you think they’ll give up on their fight against me?”
Jason shrugged. “I think so, maybe. But, if not, we’ll be ready for them. Plus–” He chuckled, and it sounded a little dark. “Plus, we’re not done with them yet. Naomi’s gonna take a swing at ‘em, too.”
Tae Hyun smiled as he thought of Naomi. She’d been a mystery to him until he’d first met her. Then, he understood why Jason had such a special relationship with her. She was more than a manager. She was a confidant, friend, and–not exactly a mother. More like an older sister, maybe. But she genuinely cared, and Tae Hyun had never once doubted her sincerity.
After they ate, Tae Hyun spoke with Yun Seo while Jason and Lily made flight arrangements to head home. Yun Seo didn’t say anything about wanting to quit, focusing instead entirely on how Tae Hyun was doing. So he didn’t bring it up, either. If she wanted to quit, he wouldn’t stand in her way. Then he mentioned that he needed to pack and–
“Wait. What? Are you leaving already?”
Tae Hyun snorted. “Already? The last few weeks feel like a fucking year.”
“Oh.” Yun Seo sighed. “Yeah. I suppose I’m just being selfish and don’t want you to go, oppa. Do you have to?”
“I do.” Tae Hyun huffed. “It’s just–I don’t know. I don’t feel safe right now.”
“And being there will make you feel safe?”
“Not being here will.”
