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“You two were so young.” He shakes his head, the tears rolling freely down his face. “Younger than your mom and I were when we had you. I only wanted to protect you.”
“Yeah, well, you picked a hell of a time to start playing dad.” He winces, but I don’t feel guilty.
“I thought I was doing the right thing.” He steps around the island and pulls me into a hug. “I never meant to hurt you. Either of you. How can I fix it?”
“You can’t.” I pull back. “I don’t care what made him do it, he still picked the game over me.”
“He was a kid, taking the advice I gave him. He loves you.”
“I know.” I bite my lip. “But it’s not enough.”
I can feel Dad searching for something else to say as I turn to leave, but fortunately he stays silent. I think he realizes that his words are just as likely to hurt as they are to help at this point, and he’s trying to quit while he’s ahead.
Trudging upstairs, I climb into bed and bury my head in the pillow to muffle my sobs. How could the people closest to me hurt me so badly? How could they ever mistake breaking my heart as a way to protect me? And then they hid the truth all these years? Do I mean so little to them?
I get how Dad, in his own backwards way, could think he was looking out for me. I’m not sure I can forgive him for it, but I get it. Wes though, he’s harder to reconcile. He may have been a kid following his idol’s advice, but that advice was the exact opposite of every truth I’d ever shared with him. He knew how much it hurt me to have my father do it. Why would he think this would’ve been any different?
God I hate football. First it took Dad, then Wes, and even now everyone I love is enamored with it. I tried to escape it but still it wants to suffocate me, and if I stay in this house, it just might.
After calling in sick, I reach for my suitcase, knowing what I have to do. Emmy and Alex won’t understand, not yet anyway, but hopefully one day they will. Hopefully one day they’ll forgive me.
I’ve got one bag packed and am starting on the next when a soft knock echoes through the room. I pause, wondering if I heard right since everyone should be at the game by now. But it comes again, just before the door opens to reveal Wes. Dressed in slacks with a shirt and tie, he looks every bit the executive he’s supposed to be, although to me he seems like a boy playing dress up. Suits were never his thing without a special occasion.
He takes in the sight before him with a grim look. “Running away?”
Instead of answering I fold the shirt in my hand and put it in the suitcase.
“Where will you go?”
“I still have my apartment in D.C. and I can probably get my old job back.”
He nods absently, acknowledging but not approving of my answer.
“I never wanted to chase you away.” His amber eyes are full of remorse, so I focus on packing to avoid getting lost in them.
“You didn’t. Not by yourself anyway.”
“Colt told me.” He sighs as he steps into the room and takes a seat on the bed, which creaks under the weight of his muscled physique. The one framed by a button-down shirt with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows, making it impossible not to notice how his forearms flex as he wrings his hands.
That’s when it hits me – suit pants, button-down shirt. One with a Stallions logo on it.
“Shouldn’t you be at the game right now?”
“Yes.” His eyes still haven’t left his hands.
“Why aren’t you?”
“I was afraid if I didn’t come find you now I’d never see you again, and I couldn’t go through that again.”
“Again?” I fight not to roll my eyes.
“Yes, again.” He spins to face me. “Coming home to find you gone all those years ago – that was the worst moment of my life. My heart felt like it had been ripped out my chest. I couldn’t speak, couldn’t breathe. I’ve never felt pain like that, not even when I blew my knee. Colt told me he talked to you and I just knew. I had to get here before you left for good.”
“Probably not wise to ditch your job during the first home game,” I snort, putting another shirt in my suitcase.
“Screw the job.” He vaults off the bed and starts pacing. “It was an excuse to come back to Denver, one I hoped would eventually bring me closer to you.”
“It’s too late to choose me over the game. You already made that choice. You gave up.”
