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He runs his fingers through his short blond hair and seems dazed by me standing in front of him. “Um, hey. You were the last person I expected to see.”
“I figured as much.” I slide my hands into the pockets of my coat, waiting for something else from Xan. Maybe I’m expecting too much after I dismissed him. “I can leave, if I’ve worn out my welcome.”
His eyes widen as I take a step back, still watching his features.
“No, I don’t want you to leave. Honestly, Clark, it’s the last fucking thing I want.” He takes a step toward me and it’s the invitation I’ve been waiting for, and I charge him, crashing my body into his as I cross over the threshold. I push him in and with my foot, I slam the door. I back him up until his body reaches the couch. He falls on it and I wait no time until I crawl over him.
“I’m sorry. You’re not the only one who felt more when we were together. This is nuts and I can’t explain it, but I don’t want to think. I just want you. If this is our last night together, I want it to be a night we remember.”
His eyes flash with something akin to uncertainty, but I don’t stop to address it, not yet.
“Kiss me, Farmer. Kiss me where I’ll forever feel your lips on me.”
Fuck, he’s actually a smooth talker and kind of romantic.
“Xan,” I whisper, our foreheads touching one another. “Take me to bed, and I’ll kiss you, and blow you, and fuck your ass, then let you do the same thing…after I recover, of course.”
“I can’t say no to you, Clark. And more so, I don’t want to.” His fingers lace with mine, and he’s quickly pulling me past a large living space with tall ceilings, and down a narrow hallway, with several doors, all shut. At the end of it, is an open door. We pass through the space, and in the middle of his room sits a large bed, unmade, and several bookshelves with more books than what a small library holds.
It’s a space that screams what I know of him already. He’s not a slob, but he’s not overly obsessed with cleanliness like I am. He reads every chance he gets; it was something I learned about him on the nights we stayed awake and talked.
But, I’m not in his room for any other reason than to feel his body on mine.
He pushes me onto the bed and stalks closer, crawling over me to get to my mouth. He kisses me with the hunger of a man who hasn’t eaten in months and I’m his next meal, and his lips on mine are delicious, it’s the taste of Xan I remember and want to burn to memory.
“You made me wait, farm boy. I’m doing the fucking tonight. It’s my cock you’ll remember on the lonely nights in a new city.”
My mind relives the first time he pushed into me, and I want to repeat it. And maybe let him do it again before I leave for the airport. And a sense of peace rests over me, as dread does, too, because I’ll miss him. I’ve avoided this, but fuck, I’m going to miss Xander Lynol.
“I surrender to you, Xan.” There’s no choice, he’s pushed himself so deep into my life, my heart, and my soul. I think I surrendered to him the first time we began flirting with each other at the cabin.
I’ve missed his mesmerizing touch.
“Turn over.” And like I did the first time we were together, we face one another. “Clark, you are…”
“I know, you are, too.”
What are we? More than a fuck. More to one another. Someone we’ll both miss. The exact words don’t matter because it’s all and more, when it comes to us.
In my ecstasy of being in this man’s arms, I missed him rolling the condom onto his cock and he lubes his erection, I know right now, we’re different. I’m different and I want him. And only him.
His cock enters me and our eyes stay glued to the other.
He starts to whisper one word at a time, and I understand everything in his short sentences. “Beautiful. Everything. Precious. Sweet.” It’s every way he sees me but the best word, the one I’d not been prepared for, but love more than them all is barely a whisper, and I’m unsure if I hear him right.
His orgasm builds as mine does, too, and I’d never been with another where we seem to come at the same time, like I do with Xan.
We come because I can’t hold on a second longer, as he says the same thing, again. This time I hear him loud and clear. And it’s the most beautiful word I’ve ever heard him utter.
And that word, I’ll hold in my heart when we’re apart.
He says it one more time, kissing me on my lips. I’m speechless when he saysmineagain and again. And I want to be his, as I want him to be mine, too.
* * *
His arms wraparound my body and he tugs me back into him. “Someone is ready to go again,” I tease.
“Yeah, baby. Something about you has my cock on overdrive.”
