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That was why it was nice to have coworkers as friends. I could feel social but keep everyone at a distance.
In fact, she knew very little about my past at all. I'd tried to keep it that way but still felt close to Melanie.
“I haven’t told him yet. I might not.” I shrugged. “At least until I move.”
Her brows rose, and she made a clicking sound with her tongue. “I see. So basically, you’ll make me do the hard part when he comes in one morning for his large Americano and asks where you’re at?”
I giggled and eyed her over the rim of my cup. “Maybe.”
“Will you do one thing for me?” she asked softly, walking over to me. “Let me hug you?”
I groaned but stopped myself from recoiling. I’d been working on it with my online therapist for months. But with everything I’d gone through, it was safe to say that I was no longer a hugger.
“Sure,” I said through gritted teeth as she dove in for a squeeze, utterly oblivious that I was as stiff as a board, but that was why I adored Melanie.
She had a quirky oblivion that I craved for my sanity, but instead, I was left with a mind that wouldn’t turn off.
“See? It’s not so bad,” she mumbled as she hugged me harder.
Her arms felt like a strap tightening that I couldn’t break free from. I clenched my eyes shut and took a deep breath, slowly exhaling as she stepped back.
Melanie studied me and quickly dropped her arms to her sides. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know…”
I chuckled, trying to make it less awkward, but it wasn’t working. “It’s not you. It’s me. Totally me.”
Her brow quirked. “Usually, it’s some guy with a beard who’s telling me that.”
I snickered. “I’m going to miss you, Mel. You always know the perfect thing to say.”
“Are you sure there’s nothing I can do to make you stay? Like promise to clean your apartment for a year or give you free coffee?”
“You already give me free coffee.” I winked at her. “But, no. I need to go back home. It’s too hard to be in this town when Zack’s here, and I know I can’t make things work with him, and I need family right now.”
She let out a deep breath. “I know, and I fully support you. I just don’t know how Zack is going to take it. He hasn’t been the same when he comes in for his usual.”
Hearing that tugged at my heart.
“He’ll be fine. He’s strong and stable, a total catch. He’ll find someone soon, and the quicker I’m out of his hair, the better.” It was as if I lied to myself enough times, it would come true.
A faint smile touched her lips. “Are you sure you don’t want to tell him?”
I shook my head, but her eyes filled with surprise as her gaze darted over my shoulders.
And then I heard the sound.
The one voice that could ignite every part of my body was right behind me.
“Tell me what?” The gruffness of his tone made my heart break a little more.
He was supposed to be in Alaska this week.
This entire week.
That was one of the many reasons I chose to go back home. He was rarely here anyway.
Melanie’s eyes widened while she grabbed an empty cup, filled it with coffee, and handed it to Zack.
“I’ll be in the back organizing syrups or napkins or rubber bands.” She pressed her lips together, looked at the both of us, and spun around.
