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I feel sad that I never got to meet her. She was such a big part of Skid’s life. I understand that he’s always gonna love her, and he’s always gonna miss her, which is why it feels strange that she will forever be a stranger to me.
“You okay?” Skid pauses from the book he’s reading, narrowing his eyes across the room at me.
“I’m fine.” I use the sleeve of my sweater to dry the tear that's escaped my eye and is running down my cheek.
“Ya sure?” He frowns.
“I’m just really happy.” I smile back, and he nods his head and smiles himself before getting back to the story.
Charlie chooses Skid to tuck him into bed when the story’s done, and Skid gets up dutifully, taking him to his room like he’s been doing it ever since the day he was born. He comes back out a few minutes later, flopping himself back on the sofa and tapping his knee for me to go to him.
“You look tired.” I get up from the chair and move toward him, sitting on his lap and relaxing in his arms.
“I’m good.” He breathes me in through his nostrils and holds me tighter.
“Do you think Carly would have liked me?” I ask curiously, and when he pulls back his head and stares at me in confusion, I wonder if I’ve overstepped the mark.
“I’m sorry I was just… I just wonder what she would think about all this.” I wish I hadn’t asked, especially now that he looks so sad.
“Carly would have liked you very much.” His voice comes out raspy as his finger draws a soft circle on my thigh that he focuses real hard on.
“I hope so. I… I…”
“Just say what you wanna say, Ads,” Skid whispers when he notices me struggling.
“I feel like I’m stealing the life she should have had.” I force out the words, trying not to tear up again, and the creases in Skid’s forehead furrow deeper as my words sink in.
“You're not stealin’ anything.” He eventually shakes his head. “Carly was all about bein’ positive. When I was havin’ those real dark days, I used to hate myself for letting her down and not findin’ anything to be positive about. I felt myself sinking, lower and lower, and I’d imagine her screamin’ at me to pull myself back up. I knew she’d be angry at me when I was pushing away all the people who wanted to be there for me. Carly wouldn’t see this as you stealin’ anything away from her. She’d be grateful for everything you're givin’ me.” He smiles sadly.
“I wanna know more about her. I want you to feel like you can talk about her. It’s always gonna be okay for you to still love her, Skid.”
“That's exactly the kinda thing she’d have said.” He smiles, tucking my head back into his shoulder and holding me in his arms.
“I’m tellin’ ya, Skid. It’s him. He arrived back here about eight this morning.” Tripp gives me the news I want to hear.
“So, he’s back at the village?” I can’t help feeling excited. If I know that he’s there it means I can get to him.
“Yep, he’s here alright.”
“And you’re ready to disable those explosives?”
“That’s amateur stuff. What I needed was to know these men’s routine, now I got ‘em figured.”
“Sit tight. I’ll be there tomorrow.” I hang up the phone when Addison comes out of the bedroom. She’s smiling contently to herself as she stretches her arms out above her head, lifting her t-shirt up over her navel.
“I can’t wait for you to get all big and round again.” I go to her and stroke her flat belly as I kiss her.
“Shhhh.” She glances over to Charlie’s bedroom door. “And that’s something I’m not looking forward to.” She rolls her eyes. “That and the feeling that I’m gonna throw up every goddamn second.”
“You ain’t feelin’ sick now, are ya?” I check.
“Not yet. But I’m sure it will come.” She screws up her face before heading toward the kitchen to get herself some breakfast.
“What time is the appointment today?” I check.
“It’s at three. I already asked Jasmine if she could watch Charlie and she’s fine with it. I told her we were going back to my place to get more stuff. Which reminds me, I was hoping we could call in on Nora after, let her know how we’re doing. She’d never admit it but she will be worrying.”
“No!” I snap when I think about Nora lying dead on Addison's kitchen floor.
