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“We can—”
“It’s fine,” Joel said with a soft smile. “I’m glad we found them all safely.”
“Me too.”
Fergus coughed decisively from the front of the truck and Nick wanted to say more—it felt like there was so much more to say, but probably not in front of poor Fergus, who had already witnessed to some very intense eye contact.
“I’ll see you around,” Joel said.
Nick spent the next few hours turning that over and over in his head—see youaround, not see youlater, or even see yousoon.He was distracted enough while giving his reindeer a check-up that he got a kick in the shin and he probably deserved that, even if it wasn’t particularly violent.
Seeing the little herd back in their paddock where they belonged was such a relief. He was more attached to these animals than he knew he should be, especially considering he only got to spend time with them over Christmas. They all needed rotating again on the weekend too, meaning Nick needed to borrow Fergus’s truck to take a couple into town and bring others back.
Fortunately, once they were moved around he could leave them for a couple of days in the care of some very competent handlers that were brought in as part of Nick’s reindeer-hire contracts. He only needed to check on them if there was a problem, and reindeer—despite being quite good at escaping, apparently—were fairly low-maintenance animals.
They had been a great excuse to spend a little time with Joel, who had captured Nick’s imagination in a way no other person had done in a while. He thought about that for a moment. It really had been a while. Not that his love life was an entirely depressing situation, there just hadn’t been anyone who had made Nickwant. There was a longing in his belly, the sort he wasn’t sure how to handle.
He turned thewhat-ifsover in his head as he trudged back up the hill to his house in a dusky light that was falling fast. What if he made a move and was rejected? What if he didn’t do anything at all? What if Joel liked him back? What then, in this small community? Nick hoped that his sexuality wouldn’t affect his integration here, and he had a feeling it wouldn’t make any difference to most folks. But there was still that nagging, doubtingwhat-if.
Letting himself into the cottage and lighting the fire, turning on the twinkly lights on the tree, and making a hot drink started to calm his frayed nerves. Instead of reaching for tea, Nick found an unopened box of hot chocolate in the back of the cupboard and stirred the chocolatey powder into milk that was heating on the stove. It wasn’t quite as good as Joel’s, but it was more festive than tea.
Nick settled in his arm chair with his cat on his lap and took a long look around his softly sparkling room. Even though there was a part of himself that felt very settled and content with the world, there was another part that was feeling very quiet, and contemplative, and maybe just a little lonely.
Christmas Eve came around with determined speed and Joel was caught in a fluster of last minute gift exchanges, trips to the pub, and one memorable but inadvisable game of football on the Meadows. Fingers and toes frozen and his stomach hurting from laughing so much, Joel stumbled home to a cottage steeped in the smell of gingerbread.
His mum had left a whole tin of it when she’d visited the day before.
Joel hated gingerbread.
He walked around the cottage flicking lights on and was about to start a fire in the grate when he noticed one present still lingering under the tree. He’d given away all the rest, but the catnip reindeer he’d bought at the market was still there.
In a fit of furious determination, Joel stamped his feet back into outdoor boots and pulled on a coat, hat, scarf, and gloves; shoved the reindeer in his pocket and hoisted the tin of delicious smelling, gross-tasting gingerbread under his arm.
It had started to snow again and that just increased his frustration as he stomped up the hill to Nick’s house.
Because Nick hadn’t called, or stopped by, or made any attempt to text Joel now that the reindeer were safe again. And that was justrude.Joel had taken time out from his Christmas break to track down those adorable, fuzzy little escape artists and Nick had barely said thank you.
He let himself in through the gate and almost hesitated before knocking firmly on Nick’s dark blue front door.
Nick had a wreath made with pine and holly hanging just above the knocker. Joel refused to be charmed by it.
“Joel.”
Nick sounded surprised to see him. Like the first time Joel saw him from just a little further up the hill, Nick was wearing loose joggers and fluffy slippers. His hair looked rumpled.
“You didn’t call,” Joel blurted before his brain could come up with a real greeting.
“Come inside, it’s freezing out here.”
It had started to snow again, but Joel didn’t care. “I bought this,” he said, reaching into his pocket for the reindeer. “It’s for Bastet. And this is gingerbread.”
“I love gingerbread. Thank you.”
“I fucking hate it.”
Nick turned away to put the gingerbread on a table in the hallway. Joel checked out his arse, then mentally slapped himself for it.
“Are you sure you don’t want to come in and give Bastet her present? I’m sure she’ll appreciate it.”
