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“Good.” I grin.
I give Syd a piggyback ride all the way to the bike rental place. Ellie and I each take a bike and I get mine with a trailer.
“This is so fun,” Syd giggles as she gets seated in the trailer. It has large wheels to handle the terrain.
With our helmets on we head out.
Syd is laughing her head off in the trailer, screaming that she is having so much fun. She is making her voice sound bumpy.
“This is fun. I’ve never done hiking or biking and I love it,” Ellie agrees.
I give myself a mental pat on the back for doing well by booking this trip. There is nothing like spending time with family. I need to make a point of doing it more.
I realize I referred to Ellie as family. Since my parents died, I’ve felt so alone. If it weren’t for Syd, I don’t think I would have survived the whole situation so well. I wanted to hide out and just be sad, but I couldn’t do that when I had Syd relying on me. Now it feels like I have Ellie too, even if I don’t have a right to her. We agreed on our little arrangement. It makes sense. I can’t let my emotions get in the way.
I’m in my own head when I hear Ellie shriek behind me. I turn just in time to see her wheels skid out sideways as she falls from her bike. I stop immediately and go to her.
“I’m okay. I’m okay,” she repeats.
Her knee is skinned though.
“Let me take a look,” I say to her.
“Daddy, is Ellie okay?” Syd asks from inside the trailer. She unzips the net and gets out.
“She will be just fine,” I assure my daughter.
“Give me a sec,” I tell Ellie and I pull my first aid kit out of the backpack.
“I’m such a klutz,” Ellie whines.
“No, you aren’t. The trail curved and I should’ve warned you that the dirt can sometimes have less traction.”
I open the kit and take out the antiseptic wipes.
“This is going to sting a little,” I warn.
She inhales sharply as I clean the wound.
“Sorry.”
“Don’t apologize,” she says.
After I clean her scraped skin, I place some Polysporin on some gauze and take some tape to keep it in place.
“All better,” I say and then I lean in and peck her knee.
“Did you just kiss my knee?” she asks, looking surprised.
“Yes,” I reply. What the hell did I do that for?
“Daddy always kisses my boo-boos better,” Syd cuts in. “He gives the best kisses.”
Great, now she is going to think that I think she is a child. I don’t even know why I did that. It’s fucking weird but when I touch her, I feel like I lose a part of my sanity.
“He does,” Ellie agrees, and my cheeks heat. I wanted to make her feel good.
“Well then,” I say, standing. I offer her a hand and pull her up.
