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Astrid returned. “The car’s ready.”
I took a deep breath. “I’ve changed my mind. I won’t be going to the property. I need to take care of some things here.”
“Emilie,” she said softly. “I don’t think he meant to hurt you.”
“I know,” I said, nodding. “But he thinks this is his way of getting back at me. I’ll let him have this little win.”
“What happened?” she asked.
I looked at the housekeeper. She gave a slight nod and disappeared. “Let’s go outside,” I said.
I knew our staff was discreet, but gossip made the world go round. I couldn’t afford to have a scandal plaguing me before I got married.
“I think I messed up,” I whispered.
“What do you mean?”
“I slept with him.”
She grinned. “Congratulations.”
“Astrid!”
“He is crazy about you,” she said. “I know you like him. I think you need to let yourself like him.”
“You know how I feel about this stuff,” I said. “I’m supposed to be all about duty.”
“Yes, but Theo is someone that could make you better at your job and as a person. You know you’re supposed to have children. It’s part of the crown thing. Wouldn’t it be nice to make babies with someone you actually like and know you’re compatible with?”
“I think we both know it’s possible to have sex with someone you’re not in love with,” I said with a smile.
“You know what I mean,” she said.
“I do,” I said, nodding. “But I think ghosting him yesterday pushed him too far. He went to the property without me to prove a point. He’s letting me see what it’s like to be ignored.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Thank you. So, I’m going to spend the rest of my day going over the wedding plans my mother sent my way and reading up on all the other crap I’m supposed to know as the next in line to the throne.”
“Do you need anything?” she asked.
“No, thanks. I’ll be in the study.”
I walked into the study, feeling a little strange to be sitting in my father’s chair. One day, it would be mine. I would be bringing my children here for holidays. They’d see me sitting in the chair and call it my chair. Eventually, they would be sitting in my chair thinking about what to do next. It was just going to keep going. I was a cog in the wheel.
As the evening wore on, I stayed in the study before going up to my room. I was refusing to seek him out or make any effort to bridge the gap between us. It was a game of pride, a silent battle of wills that neither of us seemed willing to surrender. I ate dinner in my room.
I knew that I was being stubborn, that my ego was getting in the way of what could be a meaningful connection. But I couldn’t allow myself to be vulnerable, couldn’t risk getting hurt any further. The night passed with a heavy silence.
As I lay in my room, the weight of my decision pressed down on me. I couldn’t help but wonder if I had made a mistake, if my pride had gotten the best of me. But I couldn’t allow myself to admit defeat. I had a feeling it was the same thing for him.
That was something we had in common. We were both very stubborn. It was actually kind of funny. Astrid thought it was another sign we were meant to be together.
But I wasn’t so sure. I couldn’t shake the feeling that there was something else between us, something deeper. It wasn’t just about pride and stubbornness. There was a spark, a connection that I couldn’t ignore.
29
THEO
