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MACI
I woke to a dream.
Because, surely, that’s what this was.
Connor’s scent surrounding me, his arm draped over my waist, holding me close, and his lips trailing down the back of my neck. Each feather-soft kiss emphasizing the flashes of our indescribable, unbelievable night that were bursting across my vision as I waited another few seconds for a telltale sign that I was about to wake up again—this time in my own bed.
But when I turned in his arms, he was there. Real and utterly perfect in a devastating way.
“Morning,” he rumbled and pushed my wild hair away from my face.
“Morning.” I dropped my head against his chest when I started yawning and felt wings explode in my stomach when he pressed my body closer to his and kissed the top of my head. “What time is it?”
“Early,” he mumbled apologetically as I lifted my head to meet his bright eyes again. “I actually have to get back to the office—we only left last night because Sanders and I needed sleep before we tried killing each other.”
The corners of my mouth pulled down as I studied the exhaustion lining his expression, and without thinking, I reached for his face. But just before I touched him, I hesitated. As if our positions and the way he was gripping me weren’t enough to let me know a few hours of sleep hadn’t changed anything.
That everything we’d said and done last night were still just as true and held as much weight.
Then again, this was Connor Green. He’d always meant something to me, not the other way around. It would take time to convince myself this was real...that he wanted me in his bed, not just a person to pass the time with...that I was someone other than Dylan and Dakota’s little sister to him.
With an unsteady exhale, I admitted, “You still look like you didn’t get any sleep,” as I finally allowed the tips of my fingers to brush over the dark circles under his eyes.
“I didn’t.”
“Why?”
Connor drew in a slow, deep breath as his eyes took on a faraway look. “Just a lot on my mind,” he said after a while.
“Like?” I asked cautiously.
“This case I’m working...you...your brothers.” The last part was said through gritted teeth and had me going still in his arms as I worried over exactly what thoughts had kept him awake.
“They won’t find out,” I said, hoping to assure him when I knew I couldn’t.
The smile he offered in return was unconvinced and concerned, but before I could attempt to comfort him, he pressed a chaste kiss to my lips and got off the bed.
“Connor...” I pushed to sitting and pulled the comforter up to cover myself, panic gripping at my chest as he headed to the closet without a word or backward glance. The minutes that followed were excruciating, but I didn’t move as my mind raced and the silence in the bedroom grew thicker.
By the time he came out, buttoning the last button on a shirt with a tie draped over his arm, I was sitting tall and still, wearing a mask of practiced indifference.
“You regret last night.”
“What?” His head snapped up, his eyes widening in bemusement. “No—shit, Maci, why do you do this?”
I lifted a shoulder. “Do what?”
“Act like you don’t care when I know you do.” He dropped the tie on the bed as he rounded the side closest to me. “You put on that stone-faced act and push me away instead of talking to me.” He gestured to me as a defeated sound left him. “It’s like you’re prepared for me to upset you and want to come across like you can’t be bothered with anything that has to do with me or us.”
“Have you met my brothers?” I tried to laugh, but it fell flat. “I have to be tough around them, or they’d give me so much shit.”
“Bullshit, Maci.” I opened my mouth, but he continued over me. “I know you have to act tough around them. I know you have to act like you don’t give a shit about anything around them. But I’m not them, so why do you do that with me?”
I stayed quiet for so long that he started asking why again before I said, “Because you’ve never cared about me, and suddenly you do? It doesn’t make sense. Nothing you ever say to me makes sense, Connor. There are the rare days when you defend me against Bryce and take care of me when I’m wasted. But then you call me Mini or a child, and you always tell me to grow up.”
A shamed laugh left me as I gestured to the wall that connected our apartments. “Last night, you came into my apartment yelling that you were done with me. Why wouldn’t I be prepared for you to hurt me? You’re—” The words died in my throat at the flash of something so unexpected in Connor’s eyes.
It wasn’t his normal intensity, and it wasn’t something I was sure I’d ever seen in the boy I’d crushed on and the man I’d fallen in love with over the years.
