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I smiled to myself. I’d always associate this space with our first kiss, but I’d of course been inside it a countless number of times since then. In the years she lived on the other side of the world, the years I tried to force myself to give up on her, I also had to force myself to associate this closet with something other than her. So, I hadn’t even thought about it when I walked inside.
I stood up and straightened myself, forgetting entirely about the missing marshmallows. I grabbed Penelope’s hand and pulled her all the way inside, shutting the door behind her. She leaned back against it as I pressed into her, interlacing our fingers and pulling her arms above her head. “Should we recreate it?” I asked, bringing my face closer to hers.
She hummed, her warm breath coating my lips. “Tempting.” She sighed. “But I’m not sure I like the taste of you quite as much as I like the taste of s’mores.”
“Well, unfortunately for you, I can’t find marshmallows. You may have to settle for my mouth instead.” She flicked her tongue across my lips. I suppressed a moan. “You know what I used to think about all that time after our first kiss?”
“Hmm?”
“If your mom had never come looking for you, I would wonder how far you would’ve let me go.”
She snorted. “I can’t imagine very far. I don’t think I would’ve been able to lose my virginity against a door in a kitchen pantry.” Her face twisted. “With all of our friends and family just outside.”
“Me either. But if I knew it was the last of you I’d get for five years, I sure as hell would’ve tried.”
Her grip on my hands loosened and I let hers drop. They fell to her side as her brow furrowed. “You were not a virgin.”
“Yeah I was?”
She shook her head. “No way.”
“Penelope, please tell me who you think I would’ve been fucking in high school? I never even had a girlfriend.” I laughed.
Her eyes dropped to the floor and a moment passed before they reached my face again. “I don’t know, I just always assumed… I don’t know.”
I braced my forearm on the door above her head, allowing me to lean into her even more. “I never had sex with anyone on this side of the Pacific until I had sex with you. I was a virgin until I was twenty. My first time was with my friend Alaina, and I’m pretty sure it’s because she felt bad for me. It was quite embarrassing, and I’d rather never speak of it again.”
Her nose scrunched up before her features morphed into something like amusement. “Why’d you wait so long?”
I shrugged. “Waiting for the right person, I guess. After I realized she was too far out of reach and I’d blown all of my chances, I just wanted to get rid of the pressure.”
She sighed. “Me too.” Her face was almost sad. I realized she was thinking abouthim. I’d be damned if I’d allow thoughts of any other man drift through her mind while I was the one pressed against her.
I leaned off the door, but kept my arms against it on either side of her head, boxing her in. She was staring after me as if she was expecting a response, but I didn’t have one to provide. Instead, I dipped my head and brushed my lips against the skin underneath her ear, knowing it’d make her shiver. I’d learned that somewhere within the last two months. I learned every inch of her skin. Some places I touched brought her comfort, others brought her chills, and a few made her cry my name. “As I was saying, I used to wonder how far you’d let me go. If we’d had privacy, no interruptions, nothing but time.” I met her eyes. “Kind of like we have right now.”
Her face flushed with heat and her eyes burned with lust. She tilted her head just slightly upwards, as if she was attempting to resist. Though, I knew she wasn’t. She didn’t want to.
She liked our games too much. She liked it when we both won.
I kept one arm against the wall but slid the other down slowly until it met her shoulder. I let my fingers trace the bit of skin that peeked out above the neckline of her sweater. Sliding past, my hand followed the curve of her waist, brushing against her breast, until it reached her hips. I let one finger inch above the hem of her top, warming the skin beneath it. “Would you have let me do this?”
“Yes,” she breathed. Her eyes were fixed on where my hand was as two more fingers found
themselves beneath her clothes.
I slipped my entire hand beneath her sweater and inched it up her stomach, to her breast. I feathered a touch right underneath it, savoring the fact that she wasn’t wearing a bra. I let my finger tickle dangerously close to her nipple. “What about this? Would you have allowed me to go this far?”
Her eyes closed as her head fell back against the door. She nodded. “I think so.”
I cupped her breast, feeling her nipple harden beneath my palm. I then took it between my finger and my thumb, twisting it lightly. Just close to, but not quite reaching, pain because I knew she liked it that way. I dragged my other arm from the wall and down her body, until it reached the bottom of her sweater.
Rather than slipping beneath it, I grabbed hold of it and pulled it up. Removing her breast from my grasp I lifted her top over her head with both arms, letting it fall to the floor. Before it even reached the ground, my mouth was back on her. I wasn’t kissing her, because our first kiss in this closet was earth-shatteringly perfect and for some reason I felt this space should remain untouched from that.
Not that any kiss from her wasn’t earth-shatteringly perfect, but that first kiss was innocent, pure. Nothing about what I was doing to her right now was innocent, or pure, or juvenile. So, my mouth landed around her breast, her nipple now finding itself beneath my teeth while the other fell between my fingers.
She let out a moan.
I sucked hard and pulled away. “What about that, Penelope?” She didn’t answer. I hadn’t expected her to. I loved the way she lost the ability to speak when I touched her like this. I loved that she was at my mercy. That in these moments she belonged wholly to me.
