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“I am. I hated that this happened to her, but she’s handling it with grace, and Unc and I are going to do all we can to make sure this doesn’t deter her from the path of life that she wants to take.”
“I’m not understanding why this made you feel like you need to apologize to me.”
“After talking to her, she gave me a new perspective. Your perspective.” Her eyes closed and she smiled softly. “Even with me saying I would be there for you, it still would have been more difficult for you than it was for me. That was a large weight to put on you, and I wanted to apologize for not handling that situation better. We were really young and had our lives ahead of us. I don’t regret our love or the baby we made…” I quickly wiped away the single tear that slipped down her cheek. “I just… wanted to say that I was sorry for putting us in that position. I never wanted us to have to face something so big, so young. I’m truly sorry.”
Her eyes opened as she swallowed her emotions.
“Thank you,” she almost whispered. “I’m sorry too. I hate how things ended between us. We’d been partners up until that point, and we should have been partners for that and after. But… it seems like you’re on the path you always wanted to be on. So that’s good, right?”
With a shrug, I shoved my hands in my pockets as we started to walk again. “I guess. I’m able to help Sym and a hell of a lot of other people. I don’t know how my life would have turned out if we stayed together. Can you say the same?”
“Yeah, I can. I can also say that I’ve spent a lot of time hating you and wishing we would have stuck to our plan to be together forever, but you’re right, we were really young. We had our entire lives ahead of us. I do regret not having our baby, and nothing will ever take that guilt from my heart but…” Her breath came out shaky, and when I looked down at her and saw her licking the corner of her mouth as she blinked back her tears, I couldn’t stop myself from taking her into my arms.
“I regret it too, Lom. There’s nothing I’ve wanted more on this earth than you and our child.”
She clung to me… wrapped her arms around me and held me desperately. Closing my eyes, I held her just as tightly. We needed this. We needed each other. If only we’d been able to do this fifteen years ago. I released a few tears of my own as we stood there. People walked around us, and I didn’t give a damn at all. Nothing mattered to me in that moment beyond Shalom.
After wiping her face, she looked up at me and gave me the smile I fell in love with when we were kids. When she placed her chin on my chest, I groaned. The same thing that always happened with her happened—my dick hardened, and my heart softened.
“Hi,” she whispered before giggling softly.
“Hi.”
“It feels like I’m seeing you for the first time all over again. I prefer this meeting more.”
Unable to resist, I placed a kiss to the center of her forehead. “Me too.”
Hand in hand, we walked the trail twice before agreeing to grab dinner at a steakhouse that was up the block, which led to us going to the bar across the street when we were done for drinks. We talked about our lives for the last several years, and it felt good. It felt like I was catching up with an old friend. I didn’t think Shalom would ever be my lover again, but if we could remain friends once the case was over, I would be at peace with that.
As I prepared to get ready to spend the evening with Carina, I sang along to almost every song that played on my playlist. Mecca and I had come to some sort of truce, I suppose, and my spirit had been lighter ever since. I couldn’t make the exception of giving him a second chance as my lover, but I was hopeful and excited about us being friends again. We’d take things slow. Even with the talk we had, I wasn’t expecting things to magically feel normal between us.
When an incoming call came through, Siri told me it was Carter. I grabbed the phone off my bed and answered, taking the call off my Bluetooth speaker in the process.
“Hello?”
“Hey, you busy?”
“Not really. Getting ready to go out with Carina. What’s up?”
“Not too much. I was thinking about you and wanted to hear your voice.”
Carter was worth me taking a break, so I sat on the edge of my queen-sized bed so we could talk. He had a big part in me even talking to Mecca again. If it wasn’t for him and Sister Thomas, I don’t think I would have been as willing to hear him out, and I was glad I did.
“How have you been?”
“Good. Crazy with work. You?”
“Same. I went ahead and took the case with Mecca.”
A few seconds passed before he asked, “How’s that going?”
“Good actually. You were right. I needed closure, and I think I finally got it. We had a really good talk and apologized to each other.”
“That’s good.” He paused. “You… thinking about getting back with him?”
Chuckling nervously, I looked down at my light pink colored Russian manicure. “No, why?”
“Just wondering. I can’t compete with that.”
